A LIVING STONE

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LEGACY

One of my boys got his little feet caught under the accordion partition wall at church during service, and while I tried to pull him out, the wall swung back and forth. His dad had to push from the other side to free him. The boy wasn’t crying but was enjoying himself very much! He was always curious in his world of adventure.

The teen years were difficult, very challenging. I didn’t know the Lord then as I do now, and I know I would have made better decisions in those years with the wisdom of the Lord guiding me. But, I gained a new appreciation and understanding of my parents when they were trying to raise me. We are all genuinely doing our best with what we have inside of us at the time.

I pray for every parent out there who is down on themself for not being perfect, for there is no such thing. Today’s youth face challenges their parents never experienced, and parents face challenges they never dreamed of. The sooner we realize that the sooner we gain the peace to enjoy our families and have the courage and diligence to create a new legacy of honest, Christ-like love.

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SWEET CONSISTENCY

I genuinely believe there is no perfect person on earth.

So when I see people that generally defend the truth with people they don’t know, then turn around and refuse to acknowledge the truth about someone they know, it smacks of hypocrisy. I’m thinking along the lines of abuse victims.

These people will defend the victims until the abuser is someone they know. Then all of a sudden, the truth is overridden by their relationship with the abuser. Either victim shaming commences, or they simply disregard the facts because they know “he would never do that”, or worse, they think it’s okay. Folks, people are flawed, but sin should never be glossed over, no matter how well we think we know someone. God knows the heart, and we know what He thinks about man’s heart.

Love speaks the truth always. People seek the truth, and when they can’t find it or don’t want to accept it, they make it up.

“The heart is deceitful above all things, And desperately wicked; Who can know it?
Jeremiah 17:9

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LOVE

Love isn’t always what you think it should be.

Sometimes it’s messy or boring. Sometimes love is lonely. Sometimes it’s loud and sometimes silent. It often grows slowly if given the chance, or it might cool a little with time. It’s a place of comfort and familiarity that defies a chaotic world. Love has your back. It makes mistakes. It makes amends. It never settles for less than God intended.

I was reading a post about the true meaning of Valentine’s Day and sacrificial love. Valentine’s Day used to be pretty simple with flowers, candy, a card, tie, cologne, or stationery but now it seems to be more complicated with trying to find that special gift that stands out. But if you carefully observe and listen, “special” comes to you by necessity.

Marty and I celebrated the geriatric version of Valentine’s Day this year. I got him an orthopedic pillow and he got me a little heater for under my desk to keep my feet warm. We had a steak dinner here at home, watched some TV, and I fell asleep in the chair, as usual, while he manned the remote. Perfect!

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. 1 Corinthians 13:4–8

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LOST

I was searching the house for one thing.

I was going into dark corners, closets, drawers, and rooms and finding items I hadn’t seen for ages (including giant dust bunnies).
I decided to sort and discard while I am there, and finally,
I still need to find what I was initially looking for.

How many times when we are looking for somenthing in all the wrong places do we give up when we can’t find it? It’s there, somewhere.

I’m praying.

Don’t worry about anything, but pray about everything. With thankful hearts offer up your prayers and requests to God. Philippians 4:6

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RETREAT

I still remember this retreat. As I waited in line to check in after my arrival, I was behind a woman who was complaining about the wait and how the valets took her car without telling her where it was. I hoped she wasn’t going to be my roommate. I was so tired and stressed. For several years I never specified anyone to room with because I told myself I liked meeting different people. In actuality, I didn’t know anyone who was going that didn’t already have their roommates picked. As I stepped off the elevator and rounded the corner to my room, I saw a woman fumbling with her key in the door. Yep. It was her.

She continued complaining and grew quite angry in between trying to make friendly chitchat. She was very worried about her car. I excused myself to the balcony to check in with my husband. When I came back in she said she was going out and would see me later. I never saw her again. When I went back to the room after dinner and the first session, all her things were gone. She had left. I prayed for that woman who must have had some problems that I couldn’t know about from a first encounter.

I had that huge luxurious room all to myself that first night, and instead of feeling excited, I felt contemplative and alone. The next day I was assigned a new roommate who was beautiful, sweet, and friendly but because her friends were in other rooms we had little time to get to know each other. I was asleep when she came back to the room that night. I was exhausted and fragile and knew I would need my strength for the next few days. I still felt very alone.

God knew I needed rest and quiet, and to be reminded that He was in control and would provide for my needs. He also reminded me of the imperfections and complexity of others and how we are all fragile sometimes. That weekend God lovingly prepared me for the last time I would see my Mom alive.

After the retreat, I drove further into the mountains to visit and have lunch with my son Kyle and Danielle in Glenwood Springs, then back down the mountain and on to Nebraska to see my Mother who was in the last stage of her life. Five years of volunteering for hospice hadn’t prepared me for seeing my own flesh and blood in her final transition.

It was heartbreaking to see Mom looking 20 years older than she was, unresponsive most of the time with her eyes closed, but angry and combative when lucid. She had eaten very little in weeks, and as I tried to feed her some yogurt, she suddenly came back and recognized me, commenting on how much she liked my purse, which she had given me years before. She said “I did?”, then her eyes filled with tears as she looked at me, then at Dad. She asked me for a kiss and then turned her chair around and wheeled away. That was her goodbye. She left to meet Jesus a few days later, and I’m so blessed to have been a part of her journey.

I would have lost heart, unless I had believed

That I would see the goodness of the Lord

In the land of the living.

Wait on the Lord;

Be of good courage,

And He shall strengthen your heart;

Wait, I say, on the Lord! Psalm 27:13-14

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STUPID IS…

Can you finish that sentence?

If not, the whole phrase is “Stupid is as stupid does.” It has a negative connotation. The premise of this thought is your wisdom is revealed by your actions. Do you think it’s true?

I do, in some instances, like the photo above when the expected severe consequences of a person’s actions are glaringly obvious. But when there is no action, which is an action by omission, I think sometimes it indicates a lack of confidence rather than stupidity.

Sometimes when people don’t act in ways that favor our ways or make decisions that don’t come to the conclusion we covet, we surmise they are stupid when, in fact, they may be very wise.

When a lack of confidence is allowed to guide our lives, we are treated the way we teach others how to treat us.

If we don’t stand up for what is right, wrong will prevail.
If we, out of fear, don’t obey the Lord, we will miss opportunities to serve and glorify Him.
If we avoid confronting sin, in ourselves and others, it will continue without repentance.
If we let people push us down, oppression will be our portion.
If we allow abuse of any kind; discriminatory, sexual, workplace, neglect, financial, verbal, physical, or psychological, it will go on and on and on.
If we act unknowledgeable for fear of speaking up, we will be treated like a child.

God’s people, His sheep, the ones He called to Him for salvation, are described in the Bible as being enabled by the Spirit of God to do all things according to His will. We are His bride!

Our confidence comes from Him.
Our strength comes from Him.
Our power comes from Him.
Our love comes from Him.
Our freedom comes from Him.
Our help comes from Him.
Our peace comes from Him.
Our righteousness comes from Him.
Our courage comes from Him.
Our wisdom comes from Him.
Our humility comes from Him.
Our discernment comes from Him.

Keep looking up with faith, wisdom, and confidence in Jesus! God doesn’t make junk, and He doesn’t make mistakes. We are His chosen people, never walked upon like a dirty rug, but standing with our heads held high and eyes raised toward the path He leads. We are never alone.

Praise God!

Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need. Hebrews 4:16

So we say with confidence, “The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can mere mortals do to me?” Hebrews 13:6

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10

Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9

When all our enemies heard about this, all the surrounding nations were afraid and lost their self-confidence, because they realized that this work had been done with the help of our God. Nehemiah 6:16

With him is only the arm of flesh, but with us is the LORD our God to help us and to fight our battles.” And the people gained confidence from what Hezekiah the king of Judah said. 2 Chronicles 32:8

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. Psalm 139:13,14

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HEALING

Real healing.

Hidden wounds don’t always fester in ways that are related to the harm. This goes far beyond physical illness. It’s a sickness of the soul. People are good actors and sometimes project the effects of their wounds onto other people as they claim spotlessness.

Healing will not happen as long as the scab covers the deeper infection.

It’s not fun to let it get so bad the pain is unbearable. Read your Bible. Go to Jesus and humbly and honestly assess your life, giving it all to Him, and ask Him to heal your brokenness.

Then Yeshua said to His disciples, “If anyone wants to follow after Me, he must deny himself, take up his cross, and follow Me.” Matthew 16:24

…to make her holy, having cleansed her by immersion in the word. Ephesians 5:26

But we all, with unveiled face beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory—just as from the Lord, who is the Spirit. 2 Corinthians 3:18

Our hope is in the Lord!

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ENCOURAGEMENT

“One of the most sincere forms of respect is actually listening to what another has to say.” – Bryant H. McGill

Behaviorists say people who listen and express an interest in the other person instead of talking about themselves are usually perceived as more likable.

They also say simply smiling more has the same effect, whether you are a nice person or not. Don’t most of us think we are nice people? Why aren’t we all smiling? I’ve heard smiling makes fewer wrinkles than frowning so there’s that!

It’s also a great show of respect to allow people to enjoy their accomplishments without unsolicited advice on how they could do things the way you would do them. That is a form of condescension that can dull their joy. Why?

In a world full of fierce competition, encouragement is highly underrated! This people thing is hard! I know I have to tame the urge to insert my opinion far more than I should, but it’s worth the effort to keep still to see someone else shine. There’s a reason the Bible tells us to be encouragers to each other.

Ephesians 4:29 says, “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.”

Let’s be sincere encouragers, and if you can’t, then do what Grandma said and don’t say anything at all. We can do this.

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BORED

I don’t remember being bored as a kid.

Living on the farm where there weren’t any other kids my age to play with, I usually found things to do outside by myself. This was when I learned how much I love animals. I had dogs, cats, rabbits, fish, a tiny turtle from Woolworths, a salamander named Sally, baby raccoons, and rescued baby birds. I even hatched a baby bird in an Easter basket on top of the warm television on Easter Sunday. I also had a mean pet rooster. He disappeared around the time when we got invited over to the neighbors for a fried chicken dinner.

I tried to dig to China. I built tents on the clothesline and playhouse floorplans out of rocks. I tried to get lost in the cornfield, lay in the tall grass in the pasture, watched the clouds, and did “scientific experiments” that probably weren’t such a good idea. Still, God had me covered and kept me safe. I watched the baby pigs and once tried to save one that was being crushed by its mother. I had a rock collection under my bed that was mainly pretty gravel.

I learned to love reading and often searched the encyclopedia for fun topics. I created art projects that I came up with myself, sometimes getting ideas from Highlights Magazine. I enjoyed looking through the JC Penney, Sears, and Montgomery Ward “Wish Books”, circling my choices for Santa. I made Christmas trees out of magazines with the pages folded over. I climbed the neighbor’s apple tree. Sometimes I just sat outside and observed my surroundings. During one of these times of quiet contemplation at around age 10, I became acutely aware of God’s presence in my life and that I had a soul. Sometimes I was afraid.

My freedom as a child allowed me to become responsible for my entertainment and grow in self-sufficiency, perhaps too much. I lacked social skills and was known by many as spoiled with a lack of self-control while simultaneously withdrawing into myself for safety. While one person might scold me for my rowdy behavior, another might try to draw me out and tell me to play with the others. It was confusing to me.

Later, I learned that a trusting dependence on someone who gently guides and protects us in our youth opens the door to trusting a loving God to direct our adult paths. Some of us have to go through a living hell before we can admit and submit. We must acknowledge that our self-sufficiency is a farce and submit to the sovereignty of God over our lives. Therein lies the difference between a sad life full of self-love or hate, and a fruitful life teeming with the love of God.

Never bored.

Do not put your trust in princes—in man, in whom there is no salvation. His breath departs, he returns to his dust. In that very day, his plans perish. Happy is he whose help is the God of Jacob, whose hope is in Adonai his God, Psalm 146:3-5 TLV

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MEMORY

Something I noticed about my mom in her last years battling Alzheimer’s and other health problems, was her ability to remember things that happened long ago while forgetting the simple things in the present. It seemed so odd. But when you think about it, don’t we tend to ingrain those experiences and words that affect our lives the most deeply?

I believe those old memories are held in our memory banks, only coming out when they are jogged and allowed by our minds. They can be gifts to treasure, or burdens locked away until they are given to the Lord for safekeeping.

I never thought I’d hear myself say it…in her fragile state, Mom exhibited this truth.

She knew.

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GHOSTED

Have you ever ghosted someone or been ghosted? I have on both counts.

This article touches on a subject that is more complicated than presented. There are several possible reasons for ghosting that aren’t listed.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/stuck/202108/7-reasons-why-even-close-friends-could-ghost-us

Firstly, if I haven’t heard from someone in a while, I message them. Facebook has an algorithm that makes it so I can see the posts of only a small portion of the people on my friend list. If you don’t see them any more, it is possible they aren’t seeing your posts either.

Sometimes people are just curious. They want to know about your life but don’t really want to nurture a friendship online or otherwise. I get that. But I don’t collect friends. Why gather a slew of people on your friends list if you don’t participate? That just seems a little one-sided and well, strange.

If I ask someone to connect on Facebook it’s because I have some other connection to them. Occasionally, I will friend a stranger if they have requested and we have mutual friends, but I first verify the relationship to weed out any posers and fake accounts.

At one point, someone I had been online friends with for several years was posting some things that bothered me.They just didn’t sit right, and I started to pull away. I was hesitant to tell her why when she asked because she was a highly educated professional, and she was in grief, as was I. I didn’t want to deal with it then, nor did I want to hurt her. At her insistence, I reluctantly and I thought gently, told her what was bothering me. It was a disaster. She put me in my lowly place, and that was that.There were no opportunities for further discussion, apologies, or closure.

Sometimes people ghost because it’s the right thing to do when their priorities have changed, but they don’t want to tell you because they think it might upset you. Instead of being kind, it hurts with uncertainty.

When the ONLY time you hear from a person is when they have something negative to say or disagree with you, they might get ghosted.

If you interact with a friend’s posts, but they don’t respond in kind, or at least wish you a happy birthday or congrats on milestones, they might get ghosted.

If you know they are close to people who have hurt you and talked about you behind your back, yup, they might get ghosted.

If you are vicious, racist, or chronically rude, you might get ghosted. Most of us have bad days, but those are the times we learn to take a break from social media so we don’t bring others down. There is absolutely no good reason to humiliate or disrespect a friend or family member on social media. If you allow your friends to verbally attack, threaten, disrespect, and shout at another friend without stepping in to stop it, you will get ghosted.

Political and religious issues won’t get you ghosted unless you start making them personal with name-calling and other forms of disrespect. If you’re a professed Christian who chronically takes the Lord’s name in vain and disrespects Him without care or remorse on social media, you might get ghosted. If I speak the truth in love and you continue, I will say a quick prayer for you, then you will get ghosted. It’s that simple. It makes my stomach turn.

We teach people how to treat us. Never has that been more evident to me than in the last few years. So often, when we don’t set boundaries in real-time and online, we get run over and manipulated, mentally and emotionally. Then when we finally do set boundaries, we may be verbally attacked, ignored, unfriended, or even blocked completely.

I know some decisive, strong souls who advise against social media participation at all, but the fact is, social media is here to stay. Even with all its complexities and potential to do harm, it serves a purpose. Social media primarily provides a venue for good interaction and communication with our tribe: the people who have love and care for us and with whom we have interests in common.

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EMBARRASSED

I’ve discovered there are two types of people at the dog park:

The ones who are horrified that you don’t do something about your dog’s disgusting behavior, and the ones who say, “Don’t worry. They’re dogs, and that’s what dogs do.”

Finding the middle ground with wisdom is my goal.

Presently, our dog Dandy has decided he likes the taste of urine. He follows his brother so closely he almost gets a wet head, then he licks the spot and his brother. I noticed that afterward, his senses seemed overloaded as his lips twitched, kind of like Hannibal Lecter thinking of his next meal with a side of fava beans and Chianti.

It was at the dog park the other day when another dog peed on the concrete, and Dandy started licking it and grossed everyone out that I hoped this was a temporary adolescent phase that would go away. So embarrassing, but you know what? We all are an embarrassment at certain points in our lives. Usually, our younger years find us with more pride at the chagrin we’ve caused others than ourselves. It’s all part of growing up and finding our way.

The wise parent knows those years are fleeting, and unless it involves a serious infraction, it’s relatively harmless. Eventually, maturity sets in, and a different kind of pride evolves in knowing everybody made it through. There is no middle ground for humans to enjoy their immaturity.

There is a quote attributed to John Wayne,
“Life is hard. It’s harder if you’re stupid”.

All I can say is, yes, it is, but it doesn’t have to last forever if we don’t want it. A collection of 66 books called The Holy Bible gives us all the instructions and encouragement we need to grow and mature in life, spiritually, mentally, physically, and in our relationships. People don’t have to suffer in their foolishness if they are humbled, repentant, and willing to learn a better way from Jesus Christ.

It’s highly recommended.

When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with the humble is wisdom. Proverbs 11:2

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BEAUTIFUL

My husband thinks I’m beautiful inside and out.
Those words, which surprised me, make me want to live up to them.

Click here for a story on how to be an “Eight Cow Wife” (or Husband).
https://journeytojoy.tv/eight-cow-wife/

The world can be a cruel place. People you trust can hurt you. Loyalty can be nonexistent or misplaced. Kindness and compassion may be offered only to those who have “earned” it.

The Bible calls us to be different than we were. It calls us to be different from the ways of the world. We are to be merciful and forgiving. There’s a lot of pride in the unmerciful heart because it hasn’t been humbled. The unmerciful heart thinks its pain will be lessened by sharing it. Instead, it’s multiplied and intensified.

I don’t want my legacy to be about perfection, but instead a fractured soul buffered against the hard realities of life by God’s forgiveness, mercy, love, and grace, and extending the same to others.

When Satan tempts us to retaliate in pain and frustration, we can step back, take a deep breath, and prayerfully exhale to the Father.

And like a wisp, the temptation blows away.

Be beautiful. Be different. Be His.

“No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation, he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it” 1 Corinthians 10:13

On reaching the place, he said to them, “Pray that you will not fall into temptation.” Luke 22:40

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BEAUTY

Recently, I joined a group on social media geared toward aging gracefully. I had high hopes of finding some tips on makeup that doesn’t sink into the creases of my face and how to avert the inevitable aches and pains of an aging body. Generally, how to make the most of what I have to look and feel my best. Trading encouragement with others in the same boat to Geriatric Island sounded lucrative, and I was hopeful.

The day I joined the group, it immediately became apparent I had walked onto the boat to Alcatraz. The insensitive comments and unasked for criticism of other women’s choices and their appearance, even down to their God-given features, were appalling. I watched as a couple of new ladies tentatively posted their photos to the group, only to become overwhelmed by the responses, some of which were cruel and sarcastic. They left the group to lick their wounds on the day they joined.

Why do we place so much emphasis on looks? Is it because that’s our first impression when we meet people for the first time? What about the people we already know? Do we still pick apart their choices?

In a kinder time, it was considered rude to comment on another person’s style or looks unless it was a compliment. Even then, the mention might not be appreciated. Not everyone wants or needs to be noticed by others. At the same time, some people crave attention because somewhere along the line, they felt invisible.

Watching the drama unfold made me realize how fragile we are and how even the simplest of mishandled words can shatter souls and hope. Deep down, we will always remain children affected by bullies and those who inadvertently hurt us. Some learn to manage their feelings and come off as poised and mature, but others continue to struggle with the impulses of their youth of fight or flight. I think we are tired of fighting and choose to fly away with our broken wings, more often than not.

Is it wrong to want to look our best? Do we admire others for their inner beauty, no matter what our discerning eyes think of how they look on the outside? Do we subtly put others down because they’ve taken the time to look their best while making excuses about how we don’t have the time for such things? Does any of it even matter?

I ask questions of myself as well as of you. I wanted to know what the Bible says, and here is what I found:

You are altogether beautiful, my love; there is no flaw in you.
Song of Solomon 4:7
A wife is beautiful inside and out to her husband, who loves her.

Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.
1 Peter 3:3-4
Gentleness and a quiet spirit are classic and timeless beauty. These attributes are attainable for anyone who wants them, regardless of stature and wealth. Jesus will help you.

Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
Proverbs 31:30
A woman who thinks she is beautiful because the world tells her she is might be full of pride and act accordingly toward others. A person can let any accolades regarding her “beauty,” including inner beauty, go to her head.

Have you ever had a lovely person blurt out an insult in an effort to “help”? I have. It’s a little shocking. Giving the benefit of the doubt helps, but if it continues, you might wonder why someone who knows better keeps doing it.

Confident people can ignore the rudeness, but some sweet souls will take it to heart. The sensitive soul needs an apology, love, and encouragement, not continued criticism for “misunderstanding” or being so touchy. That’s not YHWH’s heart.

I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.
Psalm 139:14
Humble confidence is beautiful. It knows God made you just the way you are, and He doesn’t make mistakes.

Likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire,
1 Timothy 2:9
Women and men should dress appropriately to worship God, not drawing attention to themselves. It’s not a style mandate as much as an examination of motives. “Look at me” doesn’t belong in worship. In Biblical times, braided hair was considered an expensive luxury that took time. Today, it is much more common, as is wearing jewelry. It’s uncomfortable to walk into a room over or underdressed, but modesty and self-control will always be appropriate.

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.
Philippians 4:8
God first.
Think of others before yourself.
Be humble.
Give praise and encouragement.

What if there is nothing honorable, just, pure, lovely, commendable, excellent, or praiseworthy?

Just be kind.

You don’t have to say anything at all.

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CONNECT

I’m not so old I don’t remember my younger years. I remember them like they were yesterday, and I remember my fears and plans and feelings.

You always hope to use what you have learned to help the ones who come after you, but for some reason, they want to learn for themselves in their own way and time. Sometimes it’s painful to watch.

“The beginning of men’s rebellion against God was, and is, the lack of a thankful heart.” Francis Schaeffer

I can imagine it is also very painful for the Father to watch us as we struggle through life making choices and decisions that aren’t good for us or our relationship with Him. Connection is a two way street. It takes two willing people.

Help us God to connect with each other.

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TRUST

Trust is precious and pure.

It’s there from the very beginning of life when a babe looks to her parents for care and love. If eroded away by circumstances, dishonesty, manipulation and mistreatment, it’s very difficult to get back.

I think that’s the world we live in now, and time after time our instincts prove us wise to be cautious. I wish it wasn’t so. Oh, to have the unburdened trusting heart of a child again.

My full trust is in Jesus Christ alone. He is my shield of protection and my light in the darkness through which I can still see a glimmer of good…if I squint, with eyes wide open.

And those who know Your name will put their trust in You;
For You, Lord, have not forsaken those who seek You. Psalm 9:10

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LAUNDRY

How To Line Dry Clothes » Housewife How-Tos® — **http://www.housewifehowtos.com**

Sentimental Saturday:

I have a long-ago memory of when I was in first grade. A little boy in my class had the freshest, most beautiful, clean-smelling clothes, and I would discretely sniff his shirt while standing behind him in line! 😁 Because this was back in the nineteen sixties, I imagine his mother used bleach to clean and sanitize his clothes, as well as hung them on the line to dry.

I was reminded of this memory when someone asked me what the best smelling laundry detergent is. I believe nothing developed compares to the simplicity of bleach and God’s beautiful sunshine.

Oh, to have a clothesline…

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UP

I found these little graphics for a dollar at the discount store. I set them on top of my dining room hutch thinking it would be a daily reminder to start my day with right priorities. Some days I forget to look up.

When I’m having a difficult day and find myself complaining and hurting, I know I forgot to look up.

When I am envying and doubting, I know I forgot to look up.

When I’m angry and tormented, I know I forgot to look up.

When all I want to do is argue and win, I know I forgot to look up.

When my heart is broken and I’m feeling hopeless, I know I forgot to look up.

When my words are cutting and I justify them, I know I forgot to look up.

When I make excuses for my mistakes, I know I forgot to look up.

When I know I’m wrong and need to apologize but don’t, I know I forgot to look up.

When I want revenge, I know I forgot to look up.

When I’m thoughtless with my words and actions, I know I forgot to look up.

When I get tired of helping, I know I forgot to look up.

When the heart of another takes a backseat to my own, I know I forgot to look up.

When love seems so far away, I know I forgot to look up.

I don’t need to move the message lower to see it.

I just need to look up.

Rejoice always,pray constantly,
in everything give thanks;
for this is God’s will for you in Messiah Yeshua. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

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FRESH

My beautiful African Violets remind me of Grandma Ferne, who raised and propagated them in her home for many years. I love the fresh touch of nature, especially when the new year commences with frigid temperatures as it ushers out the old.

In the last few years, I’ve chosen a word to focus on each year that will hopefully help keep me centered on a path of growth in my faith. Two years ago, the word was “trust” which was put to the test as I saw several friends pass through the veil in God’s timing, not mine, and as we answered the call to move several hundred miles from the place we called home for 35 years.

Last year the word was “Submission”. When most people hear that word, they first think of the biblical submission of a wife toward her husband. For Christ-followers, it goes beyond that definition to the goal of submission to the will of God in our lives. I am consciously aware of my daily choices and seek to bring honor to Him in my decisions.

This year my focus will be “Onward” by placing the past in its rightful place: a stepping stone to learning new, honorable, and productive ways while putting my weaknesses and the less admirable behind. I want my work and words to flourish with the encouragement and love of the Lord. For the benefit of others, I want the barriers of the past to dissove.

The beauty of a fresh start in a new year doesn’t cover the ugliness of the previous, but it does spark the hope of new beginnings.

Count your blessings every day, for they are a spark of hope with each new sunrise.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

This is the day which the Lord has made;
Let us rejoice and be glad in it.
Psalm 118:24

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KIND

“Just be kind”.

What does that mean? Maybe it would be better to list what it isn’t. I know I need a reminder myself sometimes

Impatience
Sarcasm
Namecalling
Humiliating
Disrespectful
Ridiculing
Speaking over without listening
Hating
Rejecting
Shouting
Apathic
Harshness
Oppressing
Unrighteous Anger
Unrelenting Criticism
Lack of Remorse
Blaming
Shaming

Some people think unkindness makes them better, stronger, funnier, more effective, and well-rounded, but it doesn’t. They already know that, because most people tend to reflect their upbringing and life experiences whether they intend to or not, and they know how it feels to be treated unkindly by others.

It’s easy to spread pain along a path of apathy, but it’s better to do the hard thing and be who we know we aren’t, putting the feelings of others ahead of our own emotional needs because it’s the kind thing to do.

What if we skip the knee-jerk impulse and first ask ourselves, “Why do I feel the need to hurt another person? How can I be kind instead?”. Would the results be far more beneficial to everyone? Loving discipline doesn’t create malice. It creates honor, respect, and wisdom. Pain isn’t a requirement to teach life lessons for those who have known love.

Let kindness have a shot. Kindness softens the blows of the world and will soften your heart in practice.

In humility, let love prevail.

He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.
Micah 6:8

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RESPECT

We don’t kill the Wolf Spiders. They are big and scary looking but they kill the deceptively dainty and venomous Black Widows.

“Every living being deserves respect, but children, animals, and the elderly deserve protection.”

Someone commented this and I considered the words carefully. I often hear that respect must be earned and I ask myself, “Do I respect every living being”? How can I respect a person who does heinous things on purpose, or harms people while lifting others, or abuses the innocent?

I think this is the dilemma a lot of people struggle with. When is the line crossed that allows for protection over consideration? When does one man’s need and wants override the need and desires of another? Whose family comes first? Is it biblical to have respect for everyone? I went to the Bible.

Honor all people. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honor the king.
1 Peter 2:17

I learned that honor is a fundamental value placed upon each person as a child of God created in His image. It’s SOUL VALUE, knowing we all started the same with no physical restrictions or definitions, but having an intrinsic need for a Savior. We all have this need. At about the age of one, it starts to become subtly obvious.

The brotherhood is the body of Christian believers. You will know them by their fruits. Not that they are perfect and sinless, but because they know they aren’t. They turn away from sin. They don’t give up and live their lives in the flesh because perfection is impossible, and they don’t abuse God’s patience. They feel their need for a Savior intimately and don’t take His forgiveness, mercy, and grace for granted.

Children, let no one mislead you! The one who practices righteousness is righteous, just as Yeshua is righteous. The one who practices sin is of the devil, for the devil has been sinning from the beginning. Ben-Elohim appeared for this purpose—to destroy the works of the devil. No one born of God practices sin, because God’s seed remains in him. He cannot sin, because he is born of God. Loving Children Emulate His Actions.
It is clear who are the children of God and who are the children of the devil by this—anyone who does not act righteously or love his brother is not of God. 1 John 3:7-10

Fear in this context means respect. Respect God and be obedient to His Precepts. God’s commandments are the way of wisdom. Hindsight can be very painful when we choose to ignore and disrespect God.

We honor authority because God has placed those in power by way of His allowance. Trust the Lord’s all-knowing wisdom, but keep in mind that those in leadership also come under God’s authority, and His commandments cancel orders against them. Our opinions and wishes are powerless in the grand scheme of God’s plan, but He hears us!

That’s why we pray that His Will be done and for the strength to accept and follow through on our part in a way that is pleasing to Him. That’s our choice.

What if we don’t know what His Will is? For now, we do, because we trust Him.

Praying.

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HOLY

God is holy. We are not.

Never has it been brought home as clearly to me when I was a caregiver that people are closest to seeing the holiness of God when they are in a fragile state, and Satan knows it.

Twenty years ago, after trudging through a mucky decade of my life, I came out on the other side and felt a calling to give back to the world out of gratitude to the Lord. My church had a Stephen Ministry program that trained caregivers to biblically minister to the grieving, hurting, confused, and sick. I prayed about this because, mind you, this was a massive step of faith for me. I was used to being the needy one, not the one called upon to help. But I learned worldly neediness is diminished in helpers who rely on the Lord for their strength and guidance.

After interviews, two other women and I began the 40-hour training that included monthly continuing accountability and support meetings with more seasoned Stephen Ministers. As caregivers, we “ministered” to the people matched to us by the coordinator. Over the next three years, I helped a new divorcee, a woman raising her grandson because his parents were addicts, and a mother navigating the world of teenagers. All were angry and fearful, and some felt guilt. I could empathize.

Later, I spent five years volunteering in hospice care. This ministry also was a calling I would never have chosen for myself because I had minimal experience with dying people close up, only from a distance.

I wondered why God led me to do this? What if I say the wrong thing? What if I’m repulsed instead of loving? Fast forward 3 1/2 years to Mary, my last hospice care receiver, a tiny black woman with a sweet smile. I wrote about Mary in this 2018 blog post titled “Blessed Are The Merciful”.

“Blessed are the mercifu…

On the day Mary left to be with the Lord, she was lying in her bed, wide-eyed and confused. Her daughter was there along with her husband and the chaplain. After visiting Mary almost every Saturday for a year and a half, Mary’s homecoming day was when I first met her family. As soon as she saw me, she reached out and smiled. Even if she didn’t know who I was, she knew I was the one who played her favorite 40’s music, decorated her room, drove her outside and around the hallways in her wheelchair, and sat with her while she ate lunch. She knew I was there for her. I loved her, and paid my respects at her funeral a week later, sitting conspicuously in the back. No one knew who I was.

Mary went to be with the Lord in August 2011. In 2012, my mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s Disease and died in November 2017. In His sovereignty, God knew what was ahead.

I learned through volunteering that we could teach and bless others and learn and be blessed by those abiding in the most vulnerable of places.

God prepares us and orchestrates for His highest good. He makes sure everyone has something to give, even if it’s to warn us how NOT to live our lives.

In our humble condition, we are the closest we will get to holiness on this side of the veil without the Holy Spirit to help us.

If you are questioning and wondering why the Lord is leading you in a direction that seems strange and impossible, trust the Lord. Even if you are being discouraged, lack encouragement, and have no confidence, trust the Lord. Read God’s Word. Ask a trusted, biblically-sound friend, and continue praying for clarity. That ‘yes’ may actually contain a ‘wait’ clause.

“as obedient children, not conforming yourselves to the former lusts, as in your ignorance; 15 but as He who called you is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct, 16 because it is written, “Be holy, for I am holy.” 1 Peter 1:14-16

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TIME

A friend once said that when couples marry, one family is usually more dominant than the other. I can see the truth in that statement, especially when blended families are involved. One family has close extended familial relationships, and the other doesn’t. Some have the means to travel, and others all live locally. People get along, and people don’t. It happens.

Holidays are trying for families who jump through hoops to accommodate everyone’s plans. I remember. Still, sometimes it seems like one family consistently gets the short end of the stick. It’s not fair, but how they handle their slighted feelings is the difference between being considered or left behind. We know.

Hopefully, we’ve raised our children to grow into considerate adults who love their parents and want to spend time with us. Even if the gift of time isn’t offered, a simple note or phone call on a special occasion or holiday can heal wounds, intentional or not. Some people have done everything right, had loving relationships with their children, and been surprised at how quickly and efficiently they were left coughing in the dust. Nothing makes sense to explain it. My heart goes out to them.

If you are a member of the favored family, think about how it would feel to be on the other side of the fence and how you would respond. Could you resolve to share these precious people with others who love them? Inviting the other family to your home is kind and generous. But please remember every family deserves to keep their own traditions alive and spend time alone with their loved ones in their own way.

The gift of time is precious. I know it’s hard to hear when you are already stressing, but it’s like slapping your family in the face at Christmas to eat a meal that took hours to prepare, open presents, and run in two hours. It’s even more hurtful to forget your family completely. If you can’t spend a few hours, maybe it would be better to choose another day to celebrate. It really doesn’t matter when, you know, because the Spirit of Christ is alive in the love you share together. Parents’ hearts are full when they are gifted with your presence (not presents), and when that’s not logistically possible? Please call!

For those who are feeling forgotten and alienated for any reason, don’t suffer in silence. Reach out and look for ways to serve in the lives of others. You are not alone by any stretch of the imagination. By focusing on others, the pain in your heart will be lessened, and healing can commence.

In those instances when the situation seems permanent, leave the door ajar for those who shut you out because, in their absence, their lives are a mystery to you. Someday they might need you to be the hand of Jesus if they come calling. What an honor that would be.

In the meantime, live righteously in body, mind, and spirit. Keep praying. That peace you crave will come.

“Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? For even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good to those who are doing good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do this. And if you lend to those from whom you expect to take, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners in order to receive back the same.” Luke 7:31-34 TLV

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PRAYER

Dear Lord, thank you for this day.

We are blessed because You are a forgiving and understanding God. You have already done so much for us, and yet you keep on blessing us.

Help us start the day with a new attitude and plenty of gratitude, and let us take the best of each day to quiet our minds so we can hear from You.

Let us not whine about things over which we have no control. Let us continue to see sin through God’s eyes and acknowledge it as evil. And when we sin, let us repent, and confess with our mouths our wrongdoing, and receive the forgiveness of God. Please heal us, Father.

Continue to use us and bless us that we may be a blessing to others. Keep us strong that we may help the weak. Uplift and inspire us that we may have words of encouragement for others.

We pray for those who are lost and can’t find their way. We pray for those who are misjudged and misunderstood. We pray for those who are caught up in religion and don’t know Jesus intimately. We pray for those who don’t believe, but we thank you that we do. You never give up on us.

We pray for those who don’t know their worth. We pray these fragile folks don’t listen to the stinging disregard and evil lies flung at them to bring them down. May they accept to their very core that they are precious in your sight and worthy of all the good things you have in store for them.

We pray for the church and the fellowship and every member of their households. We pray for peace, love, and joy in their homes and that you provide for their needs. You are the most excellent Provider, Lord.

We pray that those who cause strife and discord within the body remember that we are all one in Christian unity, none better than another, and called to encourage, exhort, disciple, serve, and love each other.

When this world closes in on us, remind us of Jesus’ example; to slip away and find a quiet place to pray. It’s the best response when we’re pushed to our limits. When we can’t find the words, you already know our longings. Help us to be patient as we wait for your answer. May we learn to accept all things according to God’s will.

We pray that every eye reading this knows there is no problem or circumstance greater than God, and every battle is His to fight when we hand it over. What a relief it is to realize that He has already won!

As we go about our day and into the night, bless us, Lord, with your peace and presence and the wisdom that only comes from knowing You intimately.

Thank you, Heavenly Father.

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CARDS

Are you one of those people? You know, a card hoarder. I think it could be genetic.

My grandmas saved shoeboxes full of precious cards and notes given to them by friends and family over the years. One grandma had every birthday and anniversary of her kids and grandkids penned on the wall calendar in the kitchen. She had a stash of all occasion cards, and I don’t remember Grandma forgetting any of her four kids and their spouses, eleven grandkids, and four great-grandkids’ birthdays until her last years.

When my grandparents passed, the family found many of these tucked away old cards and letters, bringing back memories, love and laughter, and the answers to long-held questions for those who craved knowing more about their family history.

As a child, we lived on the farm, and it was a big deal to go to town to do the shopping. I got an allowance for chores from an early age and learned to save for gifts. It wasn’t a lot of money, but things didn’t cost as much back then. Dad usually ended up with Aqua Velva and a tie every year. Many farmers wear them, you know. Mom would get a pretty necklace or embroidered handkerchief from Woolworth’s discount store. If there was any money left, my little brother might get a trinket. I usually saved for something bigger for myself, like one of those tiny turtles eventually banned from being sold because children were contracting salmonella from them. It’s a wonder I’m alive.

Anyway, if I didn’t make one, picking out the perfect card was serious business for me. I would go to the drug store and scan all the cards for just the right one for whom I was buying.

I remember one year, I must have been around eight years old and spent a considerable amount of time browsing the cards for Mother’s Day, and the card I picked out cost a dime over what I had in my pocket. I scanned the cards again to find the second-best, but my heart was set on the first one because it was the right message. I counted my money again to make sure. Sigh. As I walked away to pay for second-best, I saw a glint out of the corner of my eye, bent down, and picked up a dime that was on the floor partially hidden by the display rack. Happy doesn’t even begin to describe my good fortune that I still remember 52 years later. I cared that much about the message and so did God.

When we moved last year, I sorted through cards, letters, and old handwritten prayers from decades ago. It was fun to read my detailed petitions and marvel at how God answered them. They brought back memories of lean times, uncertainty, my grandparents, pain, helping people, Mother’s Day when my children were little, birthdays, anniversaries, apologies, thank you’s, and singing songs long forgotten. Some were store-bought, but the most cherished of all were the sentiments scribbled on a scrap of paper by a child’s hand.

Occasionally, I’ll find a note in one of my bibles or a book that comes at a time when the message or memory is dearly needed. For a moment, I’m taken back in time and encouraged with love and hope. Sometimes that’s all it takes to change the path of the day and fill me with humble gratitude.

So if you are a note and card keeper, I encourage you to be selective. While old messages of encouragement and love are comforting and welcome, anything less than should be sifted carefully. Your heart matters. Cover it with loving words. We want to move forward with joy, not stall while looking behind.

God cares about the messages you keep.

“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” Philippians 4:8

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THIS DAY

Thirty-one years ago, after two weeks of sobriety in a treatment program, while watching the 700 Club with Pat Robertson on television, I chose this day to come to Jesus in complete submission, and on my knees, humbly admitted my sinfulness and asked for forgiveness. Jesus welcomed me with open arms that were full of love, and yes, He forgave and saved me from myself and eternal damnation. Never in my life had I ever felt the feelings that followed this gift. Suffice it to say, no drug, drink, or vice could ever compare!

I learned over the years that my faith should not be based upon feelings because feelings are not always factual. Seven years after this day of rejoicing, I relapsed for a short time. I wasn’t spending time with Jesus, and I didn’t have people in my life to remind me. I didn’t know how to follow Him on my own. I didn’t realize that reading His Word would shine a light on His path for me to walk on. Now, I nurture my relationship with the Lord, protecting my mental, emotional, and physical well-being. I’m assured of God’s love daily by reading the Bible and spending time with Him in prayer. In the past, when I had to be at work by 6 AM, my feet hit the floor by 4 AM so I had time to begin my day with Jesus. I fellowship with other believers who hold me accountable and remind me that God is in control and I am not. I love hearing how God works all things for good in the lives of others through their testimonies and encouragement!

Psalm 51:3-19 says, “Be gracious to me, O God, according to Your mercy. According to Your great compassion blot out my transgressions.
Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity and cleanse me from my sin.
For I know my transgressions and my sin is ever before me. Against You, You only, have I sinned, and done what is evil in Your sight, so that You are just when You speak, and blameless when You judge. Behold, I was born in iniquity and in sin when my mother conceived me. Surely You desire truth in the inner being. Make me know wisdom inwardly.
Cleanse me with hyssop and I will be clean. Wash me, and I will be whiter than snow. Let me hear joy and gladness, so the bones You crushed may rejoice. Hide Your face from my sins, and blot out all my iniquities.
Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me.
Do not cast me from Your presence— take not Your Ruach ha-Kodesh from me. Restore to me the joy of Your salvation and sustain me with a willing spirit. Then will I teach transgressors Your ways and sinners will return to You. Deliver me from bloodguilt, O God— God of my salvation. Then my tongue will sing for joy of Your righteousness.
O Lord, open my lips, and my mouth will declare Your praise.
For You would not delight in sacrifice, or I would give it, nor be pleased by burnt offerings. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit. A broken and a contrite heart, O God, You will not despise.

Even in the tough times, and there will always be times of pain, turmoil, sadness, and injustice until we are in Heaven, God sustains us and gives us hope when we trust Him. If you have ever wanted someone to take the load off your shoulders, God is the One. His shoulders are broad.

But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint. Isaiah 40:31

You won’t be sorry.

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ROCK

Just as I can’t invalidate the feelings and first-hand experiences of others, they cannot invalidate mine.

Feelings and experiences are subjective and personal, which is why faith cannot be dependent upon them. Even scientific objectivity is fluid and constantly changing. A doctor once told me medicine isn’t an exact science. Well, that wasn’t reassuring to me! If science depends on fallible man’s perception and evaluation, how is it ever exact?

The Holy Bible, as the Living Word of God, has stood the test of time for those who love Jesus. Science can’t disprove it but instead is supporting biblical authenticity and reliability.

https://biblearchaeology.org/research/topics/amazing-discoveries-in-biblical-archaeology/4852-important-biblical-archaeological-discoveries-in-2021-an-update-from-dr-bryant-wood

Scientific Evidence

https://www.icr.org/article/modern-scientific-discoveries-verify-scriptures/

https://www.sciencemeetsreligion.org/theology/bible-archaeology.php

Our perceptions may question and threaten to cause doubt in our minds. But through faith and God’s Word and even scientific discoveries, we can know in our hearts that God is in control, always loving, protecting, and guiding for good.

Thank you, Lord, for being the constant in my life.

You are my rock.

“There is no one holy like the LORD; there is no one besides you; there is no Rock like our God.” 1 Samuel 2:2

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PRESSING ON

In response to someone who asked why so many older couples are selling their homes and moving to places far away from their families to spend retirement:

I lived away from my family for over 35 years for various reasons, primarily job-related. Our children didn’t grow up knowing their extended families. We learned to live our lives independently, sometimes only seeing our families once a year on holidays or even less. In this absence, we created our own traditions. We didn’t have built-in free babysitters for going out. No big vacations, we camped. Rarely eating out, I cooked. I cut my kids’ hair, we wore second-hand clothes, and for years I made a lot of the gifts we gave. You do what you have to and make do.

The best explanation I have for why we decided to move is God opened a door, and we gratefully grabbed at the opportunity to walk through it. We lived 35 years in Colorado. Now that we are almost to retirement age and our kids are all grown, we decided it was time to start over in a little warmer climate, in a more centralized location to our families, where it’s more affordable to live out the rest of our years.

Most people are happy for us. We haven’t been treated very well by some. Others are just curious as to “Why?” because we now live in Oklahoma in a more rural area with a slower lifestyle and horses, cows, and steers as our neighbors down the road. On the other hand, you won’t meet friendlier people, and there is something to be said for a land covered with an abundance of tree species, wildlife, water, and green everywhere. It’s a different kind of beauty from Colorado’s mountains. Still, for a body and mind parched from the crowds and arid insignificance, it may not be for everybody but it’s an oasis of respite for us until the Lord calls us home.

I sometimes miss the old holiday gatherings from long ago with all the grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins, but this is a much different world in which we live. It was prophesied to be this way and has been in the works for centuries. Our dependence needs to be on the Lord, not our parents, children, families, or other entities. God is the Sustainer.

Frankly, I don’t know how I would have made it through the thick of life without Him, but

I am looking forward, not behind.

Not that I have already obtained this or been perfected, but I press on if only I might take hold of that for which Messiah Yeshua took hold of me. Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself as having taken hold of this. But this one thing I do: forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal for the reward of the upward calling of God in Messiah Yeshua.

Philippians 3:12-14

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PIVOT

The other day I was having so much fun playing fetch with our new pup, Dandy, in the backyard. He is only 11 weeks old but quick as a whip and loves to chase a ball and slide into it with a flourish, just like a kid would dramatically dive and slide to catch a football.

We try to expose him to new experiences and sounds, but the neighbor’s toy dog’s high-pitched, tiny yip stops him in mid-stream. Forget about finishing any job he set out to do when that happens; he high-tails it for the door with wide eyes as big as marbles.

How fast we can turn on a dime when one of our basic instincts kicks in. I’ve seen sweet mothers turn into a grimacing, staring, barely civil force to be reckoned with when their child hurts. I’ve also seen people make an about-face when they know a reward, good or bad, is coming. Sometimes the behavior sticks afterward, and sometimes it doesn’t. What motivates people to make permanent, pivotal changes in their life when a reward isn’t enough?

Sometimes discomfort does, and sometimes it doesn’t. Some of us keep going through the same pain, over and over, because we won’t change our ways even with warnings. Often those who overcome their fear of change clear the hurdles to more happiness and less discomfort.
The people who don’t make lasting changes are likely expecting others to change, so they don’t have to. It can be a long wait.

Overcomers not only seek answers but follow their findings.

Every pivot we make in our lives requires a decision. We decide to search for God. We decide we need Jesus. We decide to quit drinking alcohol, smoking, taking drugs, and celebrating things God convicts us to forgo not only for our good health but for the benefit of the people we love. We can decide our body is a temple, belonging to the Lord, on loan from Him while we reside on earth. We can choose to eat healthier. We choose to read and study the Bible to know our Creator better and follow Him.

Even though we sometimes flounder, wander, and stumble, it’s only a reminder of the ability of fear, ego, pride, and arrogance to pull us down.

We can choose to gather humility and pivot back toward True North, with Jesus Christ as our navigator. His love never changes.

This God—his way is perfect;
the word of the Lord proves true;
he is a shield for all those who take refuge in him. Psalm 18:30

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Clean

I recently got a little nostalgic and checked out the houses for sale in my small hometown in Iowa. I saw a home on the same street where my dad bought a house in his retirement years. It looked vaguely familiar, but I wasn’t sure if the address was the same. I couldn’t remember, and I was hoping it wasn’t.

Unfortunately, it turned out to be the same house he sold in 2003. It was unrecognizable and was in such horrible shape it looked like it could have been used as a crack house. The outside was in disrepair and needed painting. The inside was much worse. The carpets were torn up and filthy, and the walls were covered in what looked like mold or something splattered. I could see where a poster had hung, perfectly silhouetted by a layer of smoke residue. The blinds on the windows were broken and
bent.

With his own hands, Dad had gutted and remodeled the kitchen with new cupboards, countertops, wood laminate floor, fixtures, paint, etc., before he sold it. The only thing that still looked in reasonably decent shape was the floor. It made me sad to see what it looks like now.

We were raised to take care of our things to the best of our ability, even if they were used, old, and cheap. This included our clothes, toys, tools, appliances, and cars, as well as our homes. At the very least, when money is scarce or possessions are meager, keeping your home and yard clean and tidy give a sense of control. The calming effect is real, not only while you live there but also when you move or sell. A discipline of continued light upkeep saves time when it’s necessary to deep clean.

That said, I know some beautiful people who have relegated housecleaning to a lower rung on their list of priorities, and that’s their prerogative. Mary was an example when she sat listening at Jesus’s feet while her sister Martha scurried around trying to make things nice for Him. Mary’s reward was Martha’s lesson.

“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”
Luke 10:41-42

A common misunderstanding is that the saying “cleanliness is next to godliness” is in the Bible. Many parents have tried to pass that off to their kids as scriptural (my lips are sealed) when it’s not, in that sense.

2 Corninthians 7:1 says,
“Since we have these promises, beloved, let us cleanse ourselves from every defilement of body and spirit, bringing holiness to completion in fear of God.”

Of Jesus’s disciples, I can imagine Matthew, a tax collector, was calculated and meticulous, where Simon, a fisherman, was more laid back and, well, dirty and smelly. Both had their spiritual faults and physical and occupational differences, and both were essential in God’s plan for the world.

I find great comfort in knowing this:
Whether you decide to clean your house or come as you are,
Jesus welcomes you with open arms.

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ORDINARY

Are you content to be ordinary?

The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines the word “ordinary” as:

common
no exceptional ability
not particularly good

In 2003, Robert S. McGee wrote a book and Bible Study called “The Search For Significance,” which detailed how to overcome our insecurities about our abilities and use our talents with freedom from the opinions of others and the pressures we place upon ourselves. The book was a huge success and became a classic, helping Christians to look past the lies they’ve been told about their worthiness and look to Christ for love, acceptance, and self-worth.

As I look around at the world today, I see so much neediness as people grasp all sorts of things to fill the void in their lives; drugs, alcohol, food, sugar, social media, pornography, technology, work, exercise, and even church. When a person seeks relief from what ails them, “cures” abound. When one tool no longer fills the need, it’s easy to find a replacement.

Temporal remedies, by nature, never last long. They only allow more time to avoid our need for Jesus in our lives.

Yesterday I wrote about habits and how we cultivate them all the time. Without a doubt, developing a relationship with Jesus Christ is the best habit I’ve ever formed. Even with an imperfect life, He gives me joy. When I’m in pain, I have hope. When I feel insecure, I know I can run to Him for encouragement. When I’m afraid, He comforts. When I’m lonely, He reminds me He is always with me. When I feel beaten down by the world, He lifts me.

Isn’t simple faith what most of us are looking for; knowing in our heart that we are loved and acceptable through Jesus who made us so? We don’t have to do anything to prove our worth because we are worthy by His grace. When I felt the gift of grace was when everything else paled in comparison.

I’ve never heard anyone say they were sorry they knew Jesus, but I’ve listened to many regrets that it took so long to want to.

You are more than ordinary.

If you are His, you are chosen, and your significance is His Glory.

Believe and respond.

For many are called, but few are chosen. Matthew 22:14

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CHANGES

I was sitting here after consulting the Lord, wondering what I should write about today. Daily writing is part of a new discipline I’m trying to develop. Even if it’s only for fifteen minutes, it’s a start.

We learn new habits all the time. Whenever God blesses us with an opportunity, lesson, or sweet reward, He helps us make the needed adjustments to glorify His name.

Parents who have their first baby find themselves doing things that used to repulse them, like changing dirty diapers and getting up much earlier than they ever imagined. They seek information to give the best care to their little one, and the lion they never knew they had inside reveals in a protective posture against anyone who might do their child harm.

A new job can bring many changes; different hours, new location, learning skills, and more personality challenges to navigate while enjoying income security.

Lessons are not a bad thing, but some lessons are so complicated, if we aren’t careful, they can cause us to stagnate and look down instead of reaching up for the helping hand.

Lessons that involve other people and how we react to what they have done or not done can be devastating. A single proactive prayer when facing the temptation to respond without the Lord in mind is grounding.

One of the most challenging things I ever did was start praying for someone who hurt me deeply. I didn’t pray for them to get what I thought they deserved; I prayed for them to be healthy, happy, and prosperous. So hard to do. I didn’t mean it as the words left my mouth but almost without notice, the day came when the prayer was effortless, and I knew I had come through it, and everything was going to be okay.

Cursing the darkness doesn’t make it go away, but praying and embracing the light will. Make the changes in yourself, and the rest will follow. God will sustain you in the thickness and bring you through to the other side.

You are loved.

You are worthy.

You can do this.

Let Jesus help you.

“For since He Himself was tempted in that which He has suffered, He is able to come to the aid of those who are tempted.” Hebrews 2:18

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SWEEPING

I remember in the 60s, a time when most mothers stayed home, but my mom worked outside the home. It wasn’t a popular choice. She didn’t have to, but she always insisted on having her own money and told stories of working as a teenager cleaning people’s homes for hours and getting paid hardly anything. The money she did make, Grandma took to pay bills. It was a time of frugality and meager survival, but Mom said they always had plenty of delicious food on the table. I have no doubt these experiences molded Mom’s choices later in life.

Have you ever noticed, so often, a person’s early life experiences direct their later choices in such a way to reflect the exact opposite of what they went through? It’s like a knee-jerk reaction because they don’t want to repeat the negative experiences and emotions, and it’s such a personal thing because each person perceives an experience differently. It explains why parents who have raised all their children alike might have adult children who live and parent their children very differently than their parents did.

Oh, to be in the stage of life where looking back brings a comfortable understanding and humble forgiveness offered to others, as well as ourselves, for our young insecurities and lack of knowing better. We can even forgive those aware of what they are doing, and we do not need their permission. We can decide to keep our side of the street clean without sweeping the trash to the other side. It is truly a sweet time of reflection and closure to give the gift of mercy, forgiveness, and love and to accept it.

Time stands still, and the heart is finally at peace. Thank you, Heavenly Father. Thank you so much for never letting go.

“And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.” Ephesians 4:32

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MORNING

The path of the righteous is like the light of dawn,
shining brighter and brighter until the full day.
Proverb 4:18

Sometimes I don’t wake up feeling like I’m shining very brightly. But having a cup of coffee and taking time to spend with the Lord is a crucial component to my day getting brighter and better. It took a long time to learn that I could control my attitude toward mornings. Mornings don’t master me.

Our hope is with Jesus!

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BURNT SUGAR CAKE

It’s funny how a memory you hadn’t thought about in ages comes to mind by way of a snippet of dialog or a photograph. Sometimes I don’t even know what jogged the memory. It seems to come out of nowhere. That’s how it happened today.

My age is showing. I’ve started regularly checking the obituaries from the area where I grew up to see if I know anyone, and more often than not, I do. As I looked at the list of people who met their maker the last few days, I noticed one named Smith. Smith is a common surname, but somehow my thoughts went back to 1971, the year we moved to town from the farm.

Clarinda, Iowa, is the county seat of Page County in Southwest Iowa. At the time, it had a population near 5,400, and it’s never fluctuated too much from that number since. We lived in a house two blocks north of the town square, across the street, and down half a block from the public library.

Our house was on the corner with an empty lot on one side where the old movie theater burned to the ground and flanked on the other by a tiny, well-kept white Victorian home. The front porch invited you to visit with a wicker rocking chair and wooden porch swing, often occupied by the residents, Sam and Mary Smith.

Sam was 89 years old, and Mary was 82. Maybe it was how their parents raised them, or simply how the world was back then, but Mom and Dad had a soft spot for the elderly, and Sam and Mary became friends of our young family. I remember going over to their house on weekend nights and watching the adults play cribbage, a game I could never understand.

The light of Sam and Mary’s lives was their daughter, Trula, who had died in 1930 at the age of 24. I don’t remember the cause of her death; the only significance is they spoke about their daughter as the eternally beautiful young lady she was when she passed away far too young. I didn’t realize it then, but Trula would have been older than my grandparents had she been alive. As an eleven year old, I saw her in my mind as her loving parents spoke of her.

Mary was a wonderful cake baker and spent the better part of her life baking beautiful cakes for weddings and special events. Apparently, our visits were an event because she blessed us with generous servings of homemade cake when we came to visit and usually sent us home with some to enjoy later. Her specialty was Burnt Sugar Cake.

I had never had burnt sugar cake before, but quickly, its delicate, mild, caramel flavor with matching icing became something I looked forward to at the Smith house. My birthday favorite was white cake with white frosting, but this cake was something so unique I don’t think I’ve ever had it since, and it’s been fifty years!

The memories inspired me to find a recipe for burnt sugar cake, and although I found several, I believe this link to the old classic from Betty Crocker is probably close to the one Mary used and I plan to make it in the near future. Try it out and leave a comment to let me know what you think.

Even if you don’t bake a cake, find an elderly person to love. It will do you both good.

https://www.food.com/recipe/burnt-sugar-cake-betty-crocker-circa-1956-40842

Even to your old age I will be the same,
And even to your graying years I will bear you!
I have done it, and I will carry you;
And I will bear you and I will deliver you. Isaiah 46:4

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THE CHOICE

The opposite of love is rejection.

Love covers a multitude of poor judgments with a healing balm of forgiveness.

Rejection never does.

Love gives the benefit of the doubt, for only God knows the heart.

Rejection doesn’t.

Love seeks the good because therein lies the light.

Rejection thrives on darkness.

Love respects.

Rejection spits.

Love offers pure and soul nourishing care.

Rejection breeds resentment.

Love extends mercy.

Rejection smiles at revenge.

Love comforts.

Rejection stirs fear.

Love is interested.

Rejection is careless.

Love dignifies the humble and righteously humbles the proud.

Rejection exalts worldly opinions of worth.

Love is stillness of heart.

Rejection strikes painful blows and opens old wounds.

Love empathizes.

Rejection scoffs.

Love values.

Rejection cheapens.

Love gently speaks words of truth.

Rejection spews condemnation and shame.

Love is listening.

Rejection turns its head.

Love offers peace for the soul.

Rejection pushes away eternal rescue.

Love is a choice.

With a heavy heart but never ending hope,

Love lets go.

If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. ²If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. ³If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.

⁴Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

⁸Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. ⁹For we know in part and we prophesy in part, ¹⁰but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. ¹¹When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. ¹²For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

¹³And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

1 Corinthians 13: 1-13

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HOPE

**Photographed by Tamra Witt. Artwork by Poiema Cards.**

Her world was hanging by a sliver of hope that in three days, her will to survive would overcome her desire to leave all she ever knew behind.

Her friend put French braids in her hair to keep it out of her face while she drank the thick black liquid that would soak up the solution to her problems, she thought.

It was 1997 and sounds of the Super Bowl were blaring throughout the ER as everyone cheered on the local team with hopes of a win.

While the city celebrated, she spent three days crying inconsolably. The staff couldn’t work with her in her state of complete sorrow. She wondered where her hope was. Did she not deserve to have hope? It all seemed so pointless.

Her friend brought some clothes from the thrift store, so she had something to wear besides what she wore to the hospital. The “pastor” from church brought a carton of cigarettes. She thought how ironic. Did the Holy Spirit lead her to do that? Her parents called.

When she had rested enough to clear her head, she was able to plan. Writing out each step, she detailed what she would do and who she would call in case of another slip on the upward slope of life. Part of her plan was to find a new church and get serious. Her plan was her hope.

Sitting on the “smoking patio” filled with people in different stages of pain, a man walked by in his hospital gown and farted loudly right in front of her face. “Is this not my life?”, she thought. She tried to act like she didn’t hear it until she noticed a woman across the room stifling a laugh. As they caught each other’s eyes, the dam burst, and the inconsolable tears turned to uncontrollable laughter. They laughed so much it was starting to bother those who weren’t in on the “joke”, and they couldn’t explain because the man who caused all the ruckus was obliviously sitting there smoking his cigarette.
She and her new friend exchanged phone numbers.

The next day the sun was shining, and the air was crisp and clear. She hugged her friend, laughed some more, and with her plan in hand, went home.

“The LORD your God in your midst, the Mighty One, will save; He will rejoice over you with gladness, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing”. Zephaniah 3:17

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SERENDIPITY

Have you gardening enthusiasts ever had a plant that you gave up on because it wasn’t thriving and didn’t look like it had much of a chance? My plant was a cauliflower.

It was back in 1991. We lived in a house in Southeast Denver, an older neighborhood of 1950’s cookie-cutter homes that had nice big yards for playing kids, barbeques, and gardens. We had a huge vegetable garden in the back with an herb garden, strawberry bed, dwarf cherry tree, and raspberry bushes. In the side yard, I had a cutting garden where I had planted several varieties of annual and perennial flowers for the birds, butterflies, and me! I loved digging in the dirt and seeing what I could grow in the arid Colorado climate that is so different from Iowa, where I grew up.

This particular year I had decided to try growing celery and cauliflower. The celery took too much room in the garden as each plant needed a “mound” to be upright so the stalks could develop safely from the sun and elements. So I needed to find a place for the cauliflower, which also required ample space. I found the perfect space in the cutting garden behind the lilac bush, and I made sure the lighting fit the requirements and gave them plenty of food and water. I babied those plants until mid-summer when I realized I had miscalculated my time for planting because they were not holding up under the summer heat. They were “cool” weather plants….duh. I let them go; no more water or food for them while I concentrated on nurturing the celery.

Skip ahead two months to September. It had been a little cool but nothing too uncomfortable. Most of the garden was spent, having been harvested already. One particular day, it was rainy, and I was feeling melancholy. I had been sober almost a year, and that said, recovery is not easy. Seeing one’s self and life with a clear head and humbling evaluation could depress anyone. I hadn’t yet obtained the gift of gratitude, so sadly, I was wallowing.

My cutting garden was visible from the kitchen window, and I stood there in tears for quite a while, just watching the rainfall and the birds eating at the bird feeder. After a while, the rain turned to sleet and then snow, and not a light one either. It was coming down heavily and was quickly covering everything in a white blanket. As I stood there watching, I told God, “I want to die, but I’m too scared, it’s up to you….would you please just send down a big bolt of lightning and take me out?”. (My dramatic flair is at its best when I’m sad. What can I say!?!)

I gazed out the window at the birds. They flew about, to the feeder, up to the bush, down to the ground, hopping in the snow. There were bird scratches all over the…wait a minute. What……no. I tore out the front door and around the house to the cutting garden and behind the lilac bush, covered in snow with just a small patch visible, was the biggest, most beautiful, white cauliflower I had ever seen!

How could it be? I had completely forgotten it was even there and hadn’t given it any attention for weeks. I saw its huge leaves growing, but how could I pass by it several times a week without noticing its perfect white head? I was amazed at its beauty. It was huge, about the size of honeydew melon, and pure white with no blemishes.

The only reason I saw it that day, camouflaged with snow, was because I was at that window, focused and praying to God and ready to receive His answer. I recognized that, and because of it, my mood was lifted immediately by His grace.

What a gift! I thanked God for opening my eyes and giving me the tastiest, most succulent cauliflower I had ever eaten for dinner that evening. I had a new perspective and appreciation for the creativity of the Lord’s answers to prayer, and even for what might be an example of His gentle sense of humor.

God is so good!

**A cauliflower recipe Mom submitted to the family cookbook, circa 2007. Enjoy!**

Psalm 66:18-20

If I had not confessed the sin in my heart,

the Lord would not have listened.

But God did listen!

He paid attention to my prayer.

Praise God, who did not ignore my prayer

or withdraw his unfailing love from me.

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EXPLORE

I remember when Mom bought a set of World Book Encyclopedias from the door-to-door salesman. Back then, the salesmen drove from farm to farm selling their goods. I’m sure making a sale was like a big bonus to them to go along with the cookies and coffee offered.

Mom wanted to go to school to be a librarian in her younger years, but she didn’t have that opportunity. So she made sure we had books to read at home. In addition to scouring the encyclopedia for information about anything you wanted to know about everything near and far, I had a stack of “Little Golden Books” from the Five and Dime store and a subscription to Highlights magazine, which from its first publication in 1946, was the “gold standard” periodical for children. School Scholastic book sales were like a candy store. When we moved to town, our house was down the block from the library, and Mom made sure I had a library card. I was raised to love books.

Oddly enough, I struggled with reading at first and was in the “special group”. It seems like learning didn’t come easily to me, but it was like a breath of fresh air when the words fit together, and it clicked. Finally, I could share Mom’s love of reading, and the opportunities for exploration seemed endless.

Technology replaced encyclopedias, and now we can be world explorers and armchair experts with the internet at our fingertips. What could be better for the bibliophile, right?

Truthfully, it’s more important now than ever to discern the multitude of information we have at our disposal. As the volume of information increases, the temptation is to cut corners and accept the first communication as truth. First place isn’t always best or correct.

Bethany Hamilton was a Christian 13 year old surfer who suffered the loss of her left arm from a shark attack. It almost ended her aspirations to continue surfing professionally. She made a comeback after a period of soul searching and training with modifications to her surfboard and eventually earned 5th place in the National Scholastic Surf Association finals. Today, her story is an inspiration to others and an encouragement to “never give up”. Her 5th place win was a 1st place accomplishment.

Exploration calls for digging much deeper than the surface, and truth be told, I still would rather explore in the pages of a book than on a keyboard.

The simple inherit folly, but the prudent are crowned with knowledge. Proverbs 14:18

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INTENTIONS

“Intention” is a passive word. It hasn’t happened yet because “intention” is still in the planning stage of a final goal or thought, and there is no guarantee of completion. Like a promise, intentions rely upon the integrity that forms them, and when virtue is lacking, plans fall through. We can try with good intentions, but if there was no proper planning or focused resolve, or the heart wasn’t involved in covering all the bases with love, all the good intentions will fly out the window. I know I’ve had many good intentions stare at me from outside the window panes over the years.

A pastor I know often said he didn’t want to hear his children say they would try to do something because “trying” gave them a ready excuse for failing with half-hearted effort. If your intentions are sincere, you will use all you have at your disposal and within yourself to achieve a good outcome, and you will call on the Lord to instill love into your intention if it is His will to see your plan through.

We always think our intentions are good, but God knows our hearts even when we can’t see what motivates us. He knows and is ready to lift the veil. It takes courage to see clearly and submit to God’s will readily.

What are your intentions today? Are you ready for God to reveal your heart?

Go to Him!

For the word of God is living and active and sharper than any two-edged sword, and piercing as far as the division of soul and spirit, of both joints and marrow, and able to judge the thoughts and intentions of the heart. Hebrews 4:12

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BRIDGES

What is the difference between a person not wearing a mask because it makes them uncomfortable or they don’t believe it’s necessary, and people who drink alcohol in the presence of a recovering alcoholic because “it’s not my problem”? Both scenarios involve vulnerable people who have legitimate, potentially life-threatening, medical concerns and yet, one group is regarded as selfish for not caring about other people while others see it as acceptable to expect the recovering person to be responsible for their own wellbeing without placing limitations on their lifestyle.

The point is we have no way of knowing the medical issues of other people. They may look perfectly normal on the outside but suffer on the inside. If we require special care for the welfare of some, then the few deserve the same consideration whether we like it or not, always being mindful we can’t know what the person across from us is facing.

There are an awful lot of people throwing errant stones out there. Pick them up.

Build a bridge.

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Masks

Someone asked how my husband and I met.

When I met my husband, I was conducting a personal social experiment. We both worked in a retail service establishment, a custom framing shop, and I wanted to see how people treated me if I changed how I looked. So I took a month off from wearing any hint of makeup. It may seem trivial, but it was a daring change for me at the time, to be in public in the raw.

Some people did treat me differently; women seemed friendlier, and men less attentive. I don’t know if my looks or how I interacted with people in an exposed state caused the change, but maybe I perceived them differently because I saw myself through the eyes of vulnerability. I do know one thing. I learned the personality shines regardless of your appearance because the human heart transcends the physical. In time, I simply forgot I didn’t have my mask on!

We are all getting older every day. Someday the young ones now will be old, and the old will be gone, and it happens a lot faster than ever imagined. In a society that treasures temporal aesthetics, it is never too early or late to learn to treat each other with kindness, dignity, and respect. Anything else can be like a dagger to the spirit of an already insecure soul.

My husband passed the test.

“Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day.” — 2 Corinthians 4:16

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WOOD

Great Grandma Burley holding my brother.

Are there any other closet wood sniffers here?

I love the smell of wood. It was one of the benefits of being a custom picture framer. Now and then, I would cut into some cheap wood that stunk to high heaven, but the smells of pine, cedar, and most other woods are comforting and pleasant.

Ever walk into a place, and the scent reminds you of grandma’s old house? It’s not unpleasant, just a kind of characteristic, musty, lived-in smell. It’s nostalgic, and immediately reminds me of sitting on Great-Grandma Burley’s ancient rug that covered an old solid wood floor in the living room of a house that had a turret and an upstairs porch. There were geraniums in the window. I’m eating molasses cookies and playing with her toys, which was a shoe box full of wooden thread spools. It was a quieter time of innocence.

The reason I’m bringing this up was yesterday we went to the hardware store, and I was caught in the lumber section sniffing wood.

I won’t apologize.

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“Who’s First?”

But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. – Matthew 6:33

“We are obligated to put God first. That’s the problem…even putting your spouse first is a form of idolatry. If you truly put God first and seek His righteousness you’ll be right with your spouse. My whole point is marriages are messed up (all human relationships really) because we aren’t right with God. If the vertical relationship is right the horizontal ones will be as well.”

This is a paraphrased comment about a Facebook post that was focused on the marriage relationship. Truthfully, with the state of the institution of marriage as it is right now with 50% of marriages dissolving within seven years, I believe that whole paragraph could apply to society as a whole. In a world so focused on popular opinion to gauge the health of relationships, maybe it’s time to get back down to basics, not as a form of regression but progression.

God first, spouse before all others.

Sure, we could bide our time with mediocrity but can you imagine what it would feel like to know you are only second to God Almighty in the eyes of your spouse? I wonder how many marriages would be saved if we sought God’s desires over our own? I wonder how many relationships could avoid the trash if God were consulted instead of people, or our own understanding? I’d venture a lofty guess.

I can do all things through him who strengthens me. – Philippians 4:13

And so can you.

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“AIN’T NOTHIN’ ELSE”

I was cleaning out drawers today and found a CD-R marked “Old Documents and Photos”. I suspected I would find treasure, and I did. Included was this installment of my journal.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

November 25, 2003

This morning I took a friend downtown to the clinic for a doctor visit and to get his meds. He got out of the hospital last night. I have to say I’ve been praying for courage and strength a lot lately.

The visit to the clinic was eye opening. I was in awe, and when I left, I felt a considerable amount of gratitude. Those poor people coming in there to get their meds were coming in out of the cold, and I think most of them were mentally ill. They all had warm coats, but I heard one lady say she was having difficulty warming up. Another said she was starving for something to eat. Some sat like zombies; you could tell they were thoroughly medicated. Others chatted easily and greeted by name everyone who came in. One woman seemed perfectly normal and very conversational. Then she started chatting to herself.

The clinic provided hot coffee for free. They also had a pop machine that took 50 cents for a can of pop. One man asked if anyone had a quarter. No one did, but several said they would give it to him if they did have one. Another lady told the woman who was hungry that there were two churches nearby that gave out food. You could tell….this small group of people takes care of each other.

One woman was overjoyed that she would only have to come to the clinic once a week instead of twice to get her meds. She told everyone that she and her husband were going to their church tonight for a Thanksgiving dinner and bingo. Her husband had to wear a stocking cap at all times because he had a one-inch metal plate in his head, and it got cold and hurt when his head was exposed.

One couple invited a man to their place for Thanksgiving. I wondered where their home is, but from the looks of the man’s jeans, he hadn’t washed them in weeks, and I doubt he would mind if their home weren’t fancy.

My little one had to use the restroom, and I got a strange, almost apologetic look from the lady behind the desk when she pointed down the hallway. I understood when I opened the door to a room so filthy and trash-laden that I couldn’t bear to let my child touch a single thing. I wanted to cry.

Not long before we left, the woman who was talking to herself blurted out that she wasn’t afraid of anybody. She repeated it, “I ain’t afraid of anybody…’cept God. He has power. And Jesus. They both have all the power. Ain’t nothin’ else in the world. Nothin’ else.”

I needed to read this now.

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WASHED CLEAN

After almost 24 consecutive years, 31 years total, I’ve been sober for so long that people forget.

My children were young enough to remember very little about the previous years without being told, and my youngest never saw me under the influence. The time I stumbled into darkness and relapsed was one day 24 years ago when I ended up in the hospital with clinical depression and PTSD. I was put on antidepressants for 10 years until by the grace of God, I weaned off. I’m not ashamed of being sick. On the contrary, I am overjoyed to be healed of addiction to alcohol and cigarettes, and clinical depression.

People forget, but I don’t. I can’t.

The Lord saved me from me and gave me a life to live in gratitude. He gave me empathy for the struggles of others and appreciation for the wisdom of turning our weaknesses over to Him so that He can work His healing touch on us.

The only reason I’m alive today is because of Jesus. In my infirmity, at the end of my meager limits, I submitted my life to His will and began a new journey up a different path. Choices became clear, and there was unparalleled freedom for the first time in my life. Is it any wonder He has my heart? I now need to ask Jesus to help me with my eating habits which have become more than just a fueling of my body. Food has become a liability now that I’m older. I pray for the courage and discipline to humbly hand this part of my life over to Him so my body, His temple, can be healthy and strong. I want to be able to live out the rest of my days in whatever capacity He wants me to. I can think of no better goal.

No matter where you are at or the condition you are in, nothing is so awful that Jesus can’t take you in His arms and love you to wholeness.

When you have everything to gain is when He does His best work but why wait? Allow yourself to be loved back to life. I would love to hear your story.

Thank you, Jesus.

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HOME

This photo was taken the weekend we made the decision to move. Somewhere.

People say this is God’s country and it is, but God directed both of us at the same time to move somewhere else. We had no idea where, but it needed to be warmer but not too warm, and it needed to be in a central location to our families. A bonus would be lack of humidity but that wasn’t a deal breaker if we had air conditioning. Three months later, we were living in a state neither of us had been to before and we knew no one who lived there. A step of faith to a new life. A new chapter. Perfect timing.

I actually had an acquaintance suggest something must have happened to make us run away and I had to laugh because nothing happened other than a collective realization that after thirty-five years, we no longer felt like Colorado was our home. A healthy home is where you feel safe and loved and respected in spite of your differences. It was time to stretch our wings and conquer our fears and uncertainties about our future.

I think it’s sad this acquaintance didn’t even consider the Holy Spirit’s hand in our lives. So often that is the way it goes. We are quick to rationalize and justify our doubt instead of simply trusting God’s sovereignty and wishing someone well on their next journey. Why do we automatically want to think the worst of people?

That isn’t of God, and that’s the answer to the question. Colorado provided for many seasons. This new place is totally different, and even so, it looks so familiar. God is good.

We are home again.

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So If You Are Too Tired To Speak

Sit next to me, because I, too, am fluent in silence. (R. Arnold)

I love those special times when there is nothing more to be said, so we simply sit next to each other and let God speak.

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COULD’A, WOULD’A, SHOULD’A

I am smiling.

How do you feel when someone tells you after the fact what you could have done, what they would have done, or what you should have done?
I don’t know about you, but I start to feel like a child who can’t figure that stuff out for myself retrospectively. It makes me question my ability to be competent, and I’ve been around the block a few times!

If you are already beating yourself up for making a mistake, the last thing you need is to have someone rub your nose in your shame when there is nothing you can do about it. In a work related situation, there is a time and place for a gentle response of instruction that preserves dignity. The people in our personal lives deserve the same consideration.

I learned to smile and keep my peace because most people who do this have good intentions. They want to help you know what to do if the situation happens again. So I will listen because wisdom can be found in listening.

But occasionally, a person will give you their perspective after the fact to make you feel less than and elevate themselves. We know this because we know the person. Even so, I smile and keep my peace because the peace of the Lord is more important than any word the devil inspires.

“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”
Philippians 4:13

You and I will do better next time. I love you.

Featured

CLEANING TIP

Do you like cleaning the bathroom?

How nice to take your bath in a washtub with no worries. If I had the choice between arm wrestling a T-Rex and cleaning the bathroom, it might be a toss-up. It looks relatively easy, but it seems to be a losing battle!

When we moved, our new house had a clear glass shower stall that looked very pretty, but the first thing that went through my mind was how I would keep it looking that way. I had used the daily shower cleaners before, and they are effective but only with consistent use, and they are expensive.

While digging on the net, I found a few recipes for homemade daily shower cleaners and read the reviews. The recipe I share here works very well and costs pennies to make. We may forget to use it every time we shower, but even a modest effort is effective, and it helps the memory if it’s kept handy in the shower.

DAILY SHOWER CLEANER
1/2 cup peroxide
1/2 cup rubbing alcohol
1 tsp blue Dawn dishwashing liquid
1 Tbsp Jet Dry Rinse Aid
2 cups water
Mix in a spray bottle.

It’s a great way to use all the peroxide and rubbing alcohol you bought when the Covid panic hit! The recipe calls for the original formula blue Dawn for the cleaning power. I purchase a small bottle for this recipe and also to use as a laundry grease spot remover. One bottle of this recipe lasts our household about six weeks and is so cheap to make. You can also use the daily shower cleaner less often on the tub and sinks.

So often, I’m content to have my house look surface clean rather than make an effort to do a thorough house cleaning. However, if I look at my life with introspection, that theme can be a common thread if I’m not careful.

Nothing authentically good and precious comes without hard work, perseverance, and commitment to perform consistent maintenance.

As Christians, our attitudes, thoughts, and beliefs are all part of our own spiritual house. We are responsible for the upkeep of our home, because collectively, we form a village that has no boundaries in Jesus Christ.

By wisdom a house is built, and by wisdom it is established.
Proverbs 24:3

With due diligence, we can nurture our spiritual home with prayer, fellowship with other believers, and reading the Word of God in the Bible. The daily cleaner of our spiritual house is the Holy Spirit.

Mold, mildew, soap scum, and hard water deposits are the least of our troubles without the Lord.

Let Him in.

TALK

Good Morning! Hope you’re all having a good one so far. I woke up feeling like I might be trying to “catch” something; headache and achiness. It feels like a good YouTube tutorial day.

A post I read this morning reminded me that years ago I was quiet as a young person but in Christ I found my voice. Now, sometimes I feel stifled if I can’t get a word in a conversation! This didn’t used to bother me because I didn’t feel confident speaking anyway. I now see it as a teaching moment for learning to discern between when I SHOULD speak over when I WANT to!

We are all learning at different paces. Accepting grace and showing it to others is a life lesson in humility. May we all get ‘A’s!
Love to you ❤️

Sin is not ended by multiplying words, but the prudent hold their tongues. Proverbs 10:19

WORSHIP

I have been thinking a lot lately about what worship means to me and more importantly, what it means to God. I think He’s extremely pleased to hear the worship of His children, young and old. I love hearing the “worship team”, whether one person or a choir singing old hymns or contemporary music, but I think God also relishes hearing the fellowship singing with heartfelt praise in response to the worship team’s leading. I get a little worried when all I can hear is the team in front of me and no one around me. We are all worshippers!

At the church I came from in Colorado, there was a man who usually sat somewhere near me close to the back in a room that seated hundreds of people. He was an enthusiastic and bold singer with a beautiful voice but marched to the beat of a different drummer. I loved it, but several people were bothered. I was so happy one day when during the sermon the pastor encouraged people to sing out with exuberant praise with no worry about those around them. And to those who were bothered, “don’t complain, look around, and give dirty looks to them.” They are praising God!

Sing to God, sing praises to his name; lift up a song to him who rides through the deserts; his name is the Lord; exult before him! Psalm 68:4

TRUTH

Thinking back on those times in my life when I felt so alone and didn’t know how I could possibly make it because the chaos and pain seemed too much to bear, He was there.

Every moment, He was there. Protecting me, giving me strength to persevere and honor my vows; my commitments to Him. In my failings, my desire to honor God allowed my eyes to cut through the darkness and see the light.

This doesn’t come naturally. Our minds can play tricks on us. Satan can use our thoughts and desires against us by making them appear to honor God when, in fact, they bring Him deep sorrow.

Satan is the father of lies. I fell for his tricks when I thought I knew best. I fell for his tricks when I didn’t seek the truth because I was afraid I wouldn’t like it. Because of this, I’m learning to explore scripture for clarity. Sometimes I don’t even have to search because it stands out perfectly; it shines. And yes, sometimes it’s not what I want to hear, but I trust God and His sovereign wisdom, always keeping in mind that He is good and He wants good for us and He will use whatever means He chooses for His Glory because He loves us. He loves us!

We need people in our lives who love us with the truth. I’m so blessed to have the support of faithful Christian brothers and sisters (including my husband) who steadfastly love me enough to speak the truth in love. God hand-picked these people for me, and I’m forever grateful.

If you feel angry, defeated, overwhelmed, and alone…

Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. James 4:7

God’s Word lifts the fog of self to see the Light of Truth, Glory, and hope.

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