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IDOL

When I think of an idol, the first thing that comes to mind is a statue that people worship. But that’s so obvious.

There is an abundance of obscure idols in our world. Anything that distracts us from God can become an idol; our jobs, children, families, hobbies, friends, addictions, volunteering, pets, feelings, ministry, our insecurities, and even church can keep us from having a devotional, worshipful relationship with God by putting Him in the backseat.

How can a church become an idol? Isn’t it good to go to church and participate in worship, fellowship, and service? Not when it takes the place of seeking God personally, and by His power, living your life in His will. Even good things, if allowed to become your everything, can become an idol.

My own addictive behaviors brought that home for me. Only when I surrendered them to God because I wanted to please Him did I fully understand what loving God first meant. That’s when the miracles started to happen. Daily, I must surrender my idols to the Lord for the rest of my life.

Faithfulness to Christ should be the ultimate measure of our endeavors as Christians.

It goes against everything our flesh tells us.

Still…

Love God first.

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PAIN

Have you ever seen a person with so much pain in their heart that they said some things they shouldn’t have? They just wanted the pain to stop, and they were grasping for whatever help they could find.

More than likely, the people who love them understood and tried to help. They knew how pain can dull a person’s ability to make rational and appropriate choices and words. They knew this wasn’t a reflection of a hard heart; this was a reflection of a hurting heart. 

Later, when the pain lessened with time or the situation was resolved, it should have been better, but it wasn’t because not everyone loved the person in pain. Not everyone understood. Some people judged and held resentment, spread gossip, and blamed the very people who were hurting in the first place.

What is the answer in this situation?

Is it to distrust even those who seem to care? Should we lock ourselves in a closet when we are distraught so we won’t say anything inappropriate that others can’t handle? What happens when the after-effects of this weakness seem to linger far longer than the unfortunate event that caused them? Even after accepting the offered amends, the person may see things from a higher perspective but cannot move forward, as if being held back by invisible hands of condemnation.

I understand that not everyone can empathize, comfort, and overlook an offense. That’s where those people spiritually are now. But when unbelievers love people better than believers do, that’s a hard-core reality to accept. 

We should always take our pain to the Lord. We should also take the pain of others to Him so we know how to respond in a way that glorifies the Lord.

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AMAZING

For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast. Ephesians 2:8-9

Lord, I come before you today to praise you! I love you so much, and I praise your holy name. You saved me, and I owe it all to you! Thank you for gifting us your Holy Spirit, so we might never be alone again in darkness. Your light guides and replenishes us. You keep us safe with your blanket of protection. You guard our hearts from those who hurt us with words and actions and lack of discretion. Your peace is our testimony. Bless those I love with healing, protection, and softened hearts that yearn to know you. Bless our home and marriage with your loving influence. Bless our church and fellowship with truth and understanding of your Word and ways. Bless our land with healing and restoration through wise, biblical leadership. Cover distant lands with your power and authority. And Father, bless those suffering and fearful with a glimpse of your glory through Jesus Christ. I love you. Amen. T

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SIMPLICITY

In simplicity, the gospel calls us.

Repent. Believe. Receive. Glorify God.

May God be glorified in salvation
May God be glorified in preaching
May God be glorified in healing
May God be glorified in service
May God be glorified in treasures
May God be glorified in goodness
May God be glorified in miracles
May God be glorified in loving
May God be glorified in teaching
May God be glorified in faith
May God be glorified in loyalty
May God be glorified in mercy.
May God be glorified in time
May God be glorified in discipline
May God be glorified in truth
May God be gloried in grace
May God be glorified in compassion
May God be glorified in words
May our silence glorify God,
as well as our prayers and petitions
May God be glorified in deeds
May God be glorified in gentleness
May God be glorified in grief
May God be glorified in patience
May God be glorified in birth
May God be glorified in wisdom
May God be glorified in kindness
May God be glorified in joy

May the glory of God reflect in our hearts
Because all that we are and will be,
Is His.

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SCRIPTURE

What if it was as easy to memorize scripture as to remember lines from movies?

Earlier this month, while driving back from Iowa, Marty and I had fun saying well-known one-liners from famous movies when the opportunity arose. It’s amazing how those little bits of movie conversations stay in your mind for many years. It was like a trivia game to say one and then ask the other person if they knew which movie it came from. Sometimes, we both knew and just laughed. 

Today, as I was reading, it occurred to me how it’s always been so challenging to memorize anything. I remember having to stand up in front of the class to recite a poem in English Lit in high school and being so nervous I stumbled through it even though I had practiced until I knew it. Knowing the material didn’t give me confidence while standing before my peers, but put me in a closet by myself, and I’d be good to go.

 The Bible says:

“This is the covenant I will make with the people of Israel

    after that time,” declares the Lord.

“I will put my law in their minds

    and write it on their hearts.

I will be their God,

    and they will be my people.” Jeremiah 31:33

“Clearly you are an epistle of Christ, ministered by us, written not with ink but by the Spirit of the living God, not on tablets of stone but on tablets of flesh, that is, of the heart.” 2 Corinthians 3:3

Is it the sheer volume of scripture that overwhelms me? Why don’t I spend more time memorizing? Why can I watch a movie once and remember a line that holds no real significance in my life, but the Word of God I hold so dear is a struggle to retain?  

I don’t know the answer. But I know I want scripture so ingrained that no one can ever touch or take it away. The question is, do I want it enough? 

Yes.

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TENDER LOVE

I am praying you are blessed this week with God’s kisses on your forehead:

The blessing of knowing Him intimately.
The blessing of knowing He is by your side, cheering you on.
The blessing of knowing He is in control.
The blessing of knowing He is protecting you.
The blessing of knowing He will give you peace in conflict.
The blessing of knowing He is softening hearts to forgive and reconcile.
The blessing of knowing He is opening doors you never imagined would open.
The blessing of knowing He loves you.
The blessing of knowing He will provide for your needs.
The blessing of knowing He is the creator of miracles.
The blessing of knowing He makes all things new.
The blessing of seeing his artistic hand in nature.
The blessing of seeing the wisdom of His sovereignty.
The blessing of seeing His power through the Holy Spirit.
The blessing of seeing people through His eyes.
The blessing of seeing that fear has no power.
The blessing of seeing that hard lessons are growth opportunities.
The blessing of seeing evidence of His healing touch.
The blessing of seeing a faith that withstands all.
The blessing of rebuilt bridges, clear paths, and focused journeys.

I pray that you understand the preciousness of your relationship with Him, and through that relationship flows an outpouring of blessings to others. You can’t hide it or keep it for yourself because God’s tender love shines.
Be blessed and SHINE!

The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face to shine upon you and be gracious to you; the Lord lift up his countenance upon you and give you peace. Numbers 6:24-26

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SEEK

A few years ago, something happened in my family that devastated me. I never lost my faith in what God could do in our lives, but I was heartbroken and hadn’t felt so alone since I got saved.

I remember going to a support group at church, and I spilled out my heart with trust, and after my tears dried and it was time to go, I left with nary a hug or goodbye. I know that some just didn’t know how to respond, and it’s so sad when that happens because the person feels like it’s sinful to cry or even show strong emotion. No one followed up later. No calls, no texts, no nothing. I didn’t speak of this to anyone because I didn’t want to cause others to stumble, and I still don’t, so please don’t anyone use this as an excuse to leave or stay away from the fellowship.

I stayed away from church for a few weeks or months, I don’t remember how long, and when I started attending again regularly, it was like I was a foreign person in a new land. I felt so out of place, and it was hard to make eye contact let alone connect.

I begged people to tell me what was wrong with me: I had attended a church for over five years and felt like I had no friends. I had been active in weekly serving, attended bible study groups and women’s retreats, etc., and still felt out of place, even more so after being gone for a while.

Finally, I gave up and delved into the Word and prayer, and through His Word, God told me, “All you need is Me. Learn to seek Me before all others, and you will find what you seek”. I’m not a Bible scholar. As a matter of fact, I came to the faith in adulthood and was born again in my late 30s, and baptized at the age of 50. I didn’t read the Bible straight through for the first time until a few years ago. Do I know the books in order by heart? Do I have verses memorized word for word? No, I don’t, and it gets more difficult to memorize as I get older. But I do know Jesus, and He knows me.

I’m still no social butterfly, but I can honestly say I have many friends of faith, and I can attend church with my head held high and arms lifted, or I can sit in the very back corner by myself with my head bowed low in private communion with the Lord. I could fall to my knees in prayer at my seat, let the tears flow, and even sob. I can sing with an imperfect voice and know that He is all that matters.

Do I believe God let this heartache happen to bring me closer to Him? Yes, because no matter what happens or people’s choices, God works all for His good.

I have a heart and a hug for those who feel alone, and I look for them, but I know my job is to remind them to seek Jesus Christ before all else.

Seek Jesus.

And those who know your name put their trust in you, for you, O Lord, have not forsaken those who seek you. Psalm 9:10

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WORDS

“Oh. Why did I say that”?

You know those times when you think you mean well, but your words come out wrong, and you embarrass yourself? Well, they might have come out wrong, but they often tell the truth about where your heart is at that very moment.  

Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it. Proverbs 4:23

It’s not fun realizing our heart isn’t as healthy as we thought, and we’ve let our guard down to outside influences. We pray first thing in the morning and last thing at night, but somehow, those insecure, condemning thoughts creep in and spew out in between.

Some of my worst moments were when I was trying to share “wisdom” with someone regarding a common personal experience. I naturally feel compelled to tell stories about my experience to share a perspective I’m certain they still need to consider. Didn’t Jesus tell parables to get his point across? Well, Jesus got his point across without sounding self-absorbed. Sometimes we are simply to encourage!

At times, we will feel convicted by the sermon at church (we should all be so blessed), and the more we think about it and make excuses or try to deny the message’s validity, our attitude becomes infected with indignation and maybe even a little anger.

When we feel powerless to do anything to change a situation, and it seems like the only way we have a sense of control is with our words, without the Holy Spirit, we could very well hurt someone with words and “kill” them with sentences. Our heart feeds our thoughts, which turn into our words and actions.

The Bible says we must pray unceasingly.  

Pray without ceasing. 1 Thessalonians 5:17

When you recognize a thought isn’t from God, 

Submit and Resist!

Submit therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. James 4:7

“For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war according to the flesh, for the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh, but divinely powerful for the destruction of fortresses. We are destroying speculations and every lofty thing raised up against the knowledge of God, and we are taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ.” 2 Corinthians 10:3-5

Pray for God to help you think righteously. 

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. Philippians 4:8

Pray for protection from worldly influences.

Happy is the one who has not walked in the advice of the wicked, nor stood in the way of sinners, nor sat in the seat of scoffers. But his delight is in the Torah of Adonai, and on His Torah he meditates day and night. He will be like a planted tree over streams of water, producing its fruit during its season. Its leaf never droops—but in all he does, he succeeds. Psalm 1:1-3

Sometimes our heart is so stagnated we can’t focus on the Lord because of our fear and anxiety. It’s not a sin to be sick. God already knows our hearts and knows what and whom we need. Jesus has always been the greatest healer known to man, but sometimes he provides doctors and medicines for a season that enables us to focus on Him again with renewed clarity and diligence. Our healing may not be as expected, but He provides for us in His will to glorify His name.

I’m praying that you be given the strength to ask for help if this is you.  Our hope is in the Lord. Praise Him. We need Him so much.

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AT PEACE

The adrenaline rush.

I’ve had a lot of adrenaline coursing through my veins lately. Life is messy. If you have people in your life, you will feel the feels, no doubt about it. People tend to do what they want instead of what you want. Imagine that.

When I was a young teen, just starting to think about the vast future ahead of me and way before my dreams became foggy because of poor choices and circumstances, I asked a trusted adult if he knew of any jobs I could do where I didn’t have to be around people. He said he didn’t know of such a job.

Fast forward to 2020 with the “pandemic” and its restrictions and quarantines, and the resulting abundance of office and teaching jobs that became remote. It was an introvert’s dream come true! Until it wasn’t.

Truthfully, even introverts sometimes get tired of being alone, and there’s a reason. We weren’t made to be.

Safety from people doesn’t protect us from ourselves, and we are our worst enemy.

We need to support and remind each other of God’s presence in our lives when the times are tough, and we are afraid and losing focus. We need loving rebuke when we can’t see our sin or are making excuses for it. We need encouragement to keep going when weary of the rat race, the world, and its happenings. We need love, especially when we don’t think we do. More importantly, we need to give love to others.

God sends people to us for a lifetime or a season to provide for our needs, whatever they may be. We may not know what our needs are, but He does. So when you feel like you can’t take any more of certain people and the pain and trouble they bring to the table, remember that God put them in your presence for a reason, which wasn’t necessarily to make your life easier. God is the author of relationships. HE is your everything; not family, not friends, not church. Only He can provide the lasting peace you are craving to replace the spite of the world.

Read His love story and lean on Him.

Fret not yourself because of evildoers;
    be not envious of wrongdoers!
 For they will soon fade like the grass
    and wither like the green herb.

 Trust in the Lord, and do good;
    dwell in the land and befriend faithfulness.[b]
 Delight yourself in the Lord,
    and he will give you the desires of your heart.

 Commit your way to the Lord;
    trust in him, and he will act.
 He will bring forth your righteousness as the light,
    and your justice as the noonday.

 Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him;
    fret not yourself over the one who prospers in his way,
    over the man who carries out evil devices!

 Refrain from anger, and forsake wrath!
    Fret not yourself; it tends only to evil.
 For the evildoers shall be cut off,
    but those who wait for the Lord shall inherit the land.

 In just a little while, the wicked will be no more;
    though you look carefully at his place, he will not be there.
 But the meek shall inherit the land
    and delight themselves in abundant peace. Psalm 37:1-11

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FREEDOM

Last night I started to comment on a post asking what people thought about the movie “Sound of Freedom”, and it disappeared. The post had yet to be up for two hours and had only 99 responses, several of which were disturbingly mocking. I wonder if Facebook deleted it or the author did, but here is my comment.

Check out the current statistics on http://www.missingkids.org, the website of The National Center For Missing And Exploited Children.

Trafficking has been going on for ages. I think of Johnny Gosch, the young boy delivering newspapers on his bike early in November 1982 in Des Moines, Iowa. He just disappeared, leaving his bike and newspapers behind. Do a web search for his name. His mother started a web page dedicated to finding him, and his disappearance was instrumental in starting the practice of putting the faces of missing children on milk cartons. Whatever happened to that?

There was a televised documentary about the case, and several “sightings” were reported, but despite the clues and strange occurrences over the years, his family never got closure. He was 12 years old and has been missing for over 40 years. It is still an open case.

Thousands of missing kids and teens have been in the United States over the years that the media haven’t reported. Trafficking and organ harvesting is a worldwide money-making industry that is now exposed in full force, so it’s no big surprise the people most likely to profit are trying to suppress and politicize the movie. I hate to guess at the motivations of the average critical person.

Please go and see it.

Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. Romans 12:21

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HELLO

He said “Hi, Tamra”.

“Do you remember me from math class?”

Here I am in Costco on Monday, looking at refrigerated dog food, when my thoughts of “Will they eat chicken? Is this actually cheaper? I wonder what it smells like?” is interrupted by a man coming up behind me and asking if I remember him.

I don’t know what my face looked like, but I’m sure by the look I had on it he and his wife were positive I didn’t.

They broke up laughing. He handed me the Costco card I had dropped out of my back pocket when fishing for my phone earlier. I told him I knew I hadn’t had him in a MATH class. We all laughed as he said he had probably copied off me. I was thankful he found my card and returned it to me. All’s well; ended well.

Today as I scoured the birthday cards at Walgreens, I heard a small, soft voice behind me say, “Tamra?”. My first thought is, oh, no, not again. I turn around to see the back of a lady pushing her cart past me. I cautiously said, “Yes,” as if I were answering a trick question. The lady turned around to reveal my church friend, Vicki, who said she didn’t recognize me because I don’t usually wear my hair in a bun. Never mind the fact I was, for the first time, wearing new eyebrows I painted on with stencils and a shirt that had little holes worn in the front. Isn’t that how it is when we try to sneak out looking less than our best? I tell ya’.

We had a great conversation for a few minutes, standing in the greeting card aisle at Walgreens. Later, I had to smile at how sometimes hearing our name can bring such worry and joy simultaneously. Worry because we don’t expect anyone to know us, and joy because someone knows us where we are. In the city, that rarely happened, but here in a small suburb, it can, even if unlikely.

Have you ever felt that way about God? He sees and hears all, and He loves us as His children. We aren’t always at our best; He knows that and loves us just the same. Sometimes He surprises us with His presence in the most amazing ways, leaving us comforted and reminded of His sovereign grace.

He knows our name, and we smile.

Adonai answered Moses, “I will also do what you have said, for you have found favor in My sight, and I know you by name.” Exodus 33:17

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NEIGHBORS

Things happen.

We’ve lived in our neighborhood for almost three years, and for the first two, our mail and packages kept getting misdelivered. It didn’t matter if it was by USPS, UPS, FedEx, or Amazon. Granted, our neighborhood wasn’t located on Google Maps, which was part of the problem. A few of our packages were delivered to the subdivision a mile up the road, never to be seen because the receivers decided they could use $80 worth of wild bird food and dog food.

Another factor was the city decided to name the parallel streets in our subdivision by the same name, with the only difference being Street, Court, and Place. We soon found out our new neighbors on the next street had the same house number as ours, which added to the delivery confusion because their address was identical except for Court instead of Street. This delivery circus is how we met John and Carol.

A careful glance at the homeowner’s names and addresses revealed the problem, and we’ve spent the last year and a half taking misdelivered mail and packages and redirecting guests to each other’s homes. In the process, we’ve become friends and enjoy each other’s company as part of our extended Christian fellowship.

We’ve told many people the story of our mail and package switcharoos and chalk it up to divine intervention because none of us believe in chance. The misdeliveries have nearly ceased, but our friendship with John and Carol, made while working out the kinks, made it worth all the trouble.

God is in control.

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” Rom. 8:28

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LAZY FAITH

No photo description available.

Christian, don’t be so focused on being a “work in progress” that you don’t progress.

It’s great when you can admit you aren’t perfect, make mistakes (sin), and make the necessary adjustments in your life to change.

It’s another thing to admit you’re a jerk and expect everyone else to accept you as you are because you have no intention of bettering yourself.

Progression is hard work, but do yourself and those around you a favor.

Have faith the Lord will help you.

I say this with understanding and love,

Don’t be lazy.

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here! 2 Corinthians 5:17

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HEALTH

I have always been low maintenance.

No mani-pedis or expensive hair treatments. No fancy makeup. I have carried the same purse for months. I love jewelry, but most were given to me as gifts or inherited from my Mom’s vast costume jewelry collection. No massages until my sons gave me a spa gift certificate for my birthday a few years ago. It took me three years to use it, just before it expired. I chose a facial treatment, and it was a lovely experience.


Then, to celebrate our 22nd wedding anniversary, my husband and I decided to spend a few days in Steamboat Springs, Colorado, and Marty arranged for us to have a 1-hour couple’s massage. Now, having previously had a facial massage, I was good with that. I wasn’t too sure about a full-body massage with a stranger though. But I almost fell asleep with my husband on a table next to me in a darkened room with relaxing music! It smelled good, too! It was luxurious, and I’m glad we did it, but once was enough for me.

I do love clothes; new, old, or used, I don’t care. My new thing is watching YouTube videos of women who show you how to dress to look your best with what you currently have in the body department. You can look thinner without wearing a tent or what looks like old pregnancy clothes. That reminds me. Remember smock tops in the ’70s? Mine had pockets. I remember my mom shaking her head at the thought of pregnancy wear being in style for young women. I loved them because they were a comfortable respite from the tight, hip-hugger, bell-bottom jeans we used to wear.

In addition to wanting to look my best, I try to keep healthy because I know my health is an investment. I won’t get rich off it, but I will most likely prosper with a better quality of life in my old age. There are some things we have no control over but most of us know what we can control, such as what we eat, how active we are, how much sleep we get, and how we nurture our thoughts and attitudes. What about our spiritual life?

Did you know a study conducted at Harvard University concluded that a rich religious faith is linked with better health outcomes and is an important part of whole-person care, not just disease? In fact, spiritual practices can lower blood pressure, strengthen the immune system, and lessen the effects of mental illnesses. This goes beyond organized religion, but I focus on what the Bible says about it because I’m a Christian.

And his name—by faith in his name—has made this man strong whom you see and know, and the faith that is through Jesus has given the man this perfect health in the presence of you all. Acts 3:16 (Faith always receives, never gives. God is the giver. Affects spiritual, mental, emotional, and physical health)

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 2 Corinthians 12:9 (God’s grace and power are worth more than worldly things. Affects spiritual, emotional, and mental health)

In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, LORD, make me dwell in safety. Psalm 4:8 (Pray before you sleep. Affects physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual health)

Those who find rest in the shelter of the Most High will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty. Psalm 91:1 (Our security is in Him. Affects our physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual health)

Behold, I will bring to it health and healing, and I will heal them and reveal to them abundance of prosperity and security. Jeremiah 33:6 (Realize Christ is the cure for sin. Affects spiritual, emotional, mental, and physical health)

And God said, “Behold, I have given you every plant yielding seed that is on the face of all the earth, and every tree with seed in its fruit. You shall have them for food. Genesis 1:29 (Eat fruits and vegetables except for the Tree of Life. Affects physical, mental, and spiritual health)

“Since it enters not his heart but his stomach, and is expelled?””Since it enters not his heart but his stomach, and is expelled?” Mark 7:9. (Don’t stress. We can eat anything. Affects our physical and mental health)

“Therefore, I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing? Matthew 6:25. (Don’t worry. Affects emotional, physical, and mental health)

Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. Matthew 6:31-33
( Put God first in your life, and He will provide. Affects emotional and mental health)

For everything created by God is good, and nothing is to be rejected if it is received with thanksgiving, 1 Timothy 4:4. (Practice gratitude. Affects mental and emotional health)

Not a drunkard, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money. 1 Timothy 3:3 (Drink in moderation. Be kind. Don’t be greedy. Affects physical and mental health)

And last but not least, I end with John 3:16, which says: “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. (Affects spiritual, emotional, mental, and physical health)

These are just a handful of verses that guide how to live a healthier life here on Earth. But the eternal benefit outweighs them all. I pray you regularly consult the greatest whole-body physician there is…YAHWEH.

Be healthy.

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VALUE

The advice of “don’t neglect the old while you strive to attract the new” has several applications in life.

It’s like the companies that offer incentives to attract new customers, then hike the rates for customers whose contracts expire. I’m not too fond of that. It’s messed up.

Then there’s the spouse, tired of the mundane life of maturity, who goes looking for adventure while neglecting their family and mate, the loves of their life, at home. Loyalty goes right out the window.

What about the corporations slowly weeding out seasoned employees to replace them with young people who will work at a starting salary? They will hire two new people to do the work that one well-trained employee did.

I have gray hair. I’ve had it since my early 30’s and dyed it until I was 53. I love the freedom from having to color my roots every two weeks. But I quickly discovered how biased some people are about gray hair. I’ve had complete strangers tell me they know of a great salon where I can get it colored. I simply tell them I’m free from that and love it. I no longer had to ask for the senior citizen discount when I went natural. It was offered before I even qualified!

The young are our future, but that doesn’t mean the aged have no value. Even the most infirm have something to offer if nothing more than a lesson in humility.

What is it about the shiny new penny that is so attractive? It takes a hundred to amount to the worth of one tired old dollar bill, yet the shiny coins go in for the win to fill the jar. And after a while, when that jar is full, its contents are emptied, sorted, and traded for crisp new bills.

It’s something to remember as we trudge this life, getting older at every step. Some of us are old and wrinkled, with dog-eared wisdom and resources. Others are fresh, bright, and shiny, with new ideas and energy.

Note to self: Everyone has value. Love people. Period.

For those who can’t understand that, I’ll be praying for you. Someday, God willing, you will understand.

Remember the days of old; consider the generations long past. Ask your father, and he will tell you, your elders, and they will explain to you. Deuteronomy 32:7

Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. 2 Corinthians 4:16

but by an equality, that now at this time your abundance may supply their lack, that their abundance also may supply your lack–that there may be equality. 2 Corinthians 8:14

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SAUCE

I am on a quest.

I’m looking for the perfect authentic Italian pizza sauce recipe. Of course, I googled and found a recipe that listed all the ingredients I shouldn’t put in my authentic Italian pizza sauce because these ingredients are what Americans put in to suit their taste for Americanized Italian sauce. These ingredients include:

Inferior quality tomatoes (I have homegrown, not inferior ones!)
Tomato Paste
Sugar or any other kind of sweetener
Italian Seasoning (It doesn’t exist in Italy)
Garlic Powder or Garlic Salt ( Confusing. In the recipe, it says you can add if you like it. I did)

The sauce is not cooked, and I’m thinking, “Whaaaaaat?”.

So I make my simple, authentic pizza sauce for tonight and bag it up to freeze for future pizzas when I remember I have an authentic Italian friend I could have run the recipe by for approval BEFORE I actually made it!

Isn’t this how it is in our Christian walk through this life on earth? How often are we perplexed about something and do a little googling or take a social media poll to find the answer that bests suits our dilemma or the one we want? We take the wheel, and off we go. Later we remember the Lord, usually after our driving has caused a wreck.

God wants to be involved in all the decisions of our lives. He wants to be first in our minds and hearts before all others. The Bible is His love letter to His children, full of hope, love, direction, discipline, and wisdom. God will always provide the perfect answer.

Seek Him first.

But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you. Matthew 6:33

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SERVING

I had an epiphany recently. Let me tell you about it.


For a long time, several years, I’ve been praying that God would tell me what He wanted me to do to serve Him. I’ve been plugging along, doing odd and end jobs at church, and feeling an emptiness inside that I couldn’t explain to myself, let alone anyone else. I just knew God was preparing me for a ministry that was perfect for me, and I waited and grew more frustrated as I saw other brothers and sisters, including my husband, flourish as they served.

I pleaded to the Lord to make his will known to me so I could best serve Him. I prayed for a clear answer that I could understand without a doubt. I waited and waited some more.

Events happened recently that automatically brought specific phrases to mind. I’ve always struggled with memorization, which showed in my school work, but I have a good memory for experiences and feelings, and with enough training and repetition, I learn what is close to my heart.

When I found myself speaking the words I knew had been planted, I understood what God had been waiting for me to “get.” Imagine that! I thought I was waiting for Him to answer my prayers when He was waiting for me to understand the answer He had already given me.

He has already trained me. He has already equipped me. He has already provided for me. He has already blessed me with gifts to use. I knew that, but I felt useless and frustrated.

Somewhere in life, I developed the idea that telling others about your skills, training, education, etc., was akin to boasting and trying to make yourself seem important. It didn’t bother me when other people did it, but I couldn’t. I would allude to these parts of my life, but to come right out and say it? Guess what? There is nothing humble about hiding our abilities.

Humility is acknowledging our abilities are God’s gifts for us to use for His glory.

Now I understand. I lacked confidence in the Lord’s provision because I was comparing myself to others. That’s sinful. I repent of that. right. now.

I want to be available wherever He needs me.

I am a trained Stephen Ministry Caregiver. I’ve had 40 hours of training which I put into practice for 3 years with women in crisis, such as divorce, death of a spouse, family members with substance abuse addictions, grandparents raising their grandchildren, and parents needing emotional and spiritual support.

I am a trained hospice caregiver. I volunteered in hospice for 5 years, visiting women in nursing homes, most of whom rarely had visitors. I played music for them, prayed, decorated their room, wheeled them outside, and mostly, was just a friend to them. All of my clients were in nursing homes. My last client, Mary, was a tiny black woman who couldn’t speak but smiled a mile wide when I entered her room. I visited her nearly every Saturday morning for a year and then attended her memorial service. After she passed, I decided I needed a rest.

I rarely mentioned my years of Stephen Ministry or hospice volunteering to anyone for two decades. Why? Was it because I was embarrassed? Tired of it? Didn’t want to get involved? Maybe I felt like a hypocrite because while helping others, my home life was chaotic. Why was it so easy to care for strangers but so hard to have patience with my own family? These are questions I always ask myself, and it’s excruciating. By asking, I’m facing reality, and that’s good because it allows for change.

I sing. I sang at school, church, weddings, and events in the choir and as a soloist. I had a smoking habit that I gave up 20 years ago. Between that and a few years of family strife before my husband and I were born again, my voice was in sorry shape from lack of use and abuse. I went from 2nd Alto with a wide range to croaking frog Tenor over the years. I’m working on getting it back with exercises and soft, slow, and easy practice. If God wills it, it will happen.

I cook. I have served in meal ministry and organized and cooked turkeys for Thanksgiving dinner at church for 40+ people without family nearby. I also served in the cafe and coffee areas. My last full-time occupation was in food service.

I clean. I’ve cleaned toilets in churches, offices, and homes of the infirm. I don’t particularly enjoy it, but it works off stress, and I consider cleaning the Lord’s house part of good stewardship. We can all do our part by cleaning up after ourselves.

I had a calligraphy business as a side job addressing wedding invitations to make money when I was a stay-at-home mom. It’s a little rusty, but it’s like riding a bike. It’s not quick work, but it’s unique, not perfect like technology can produce.

We have hospitality. For the first time, we have a home built for fellowship. We lived the last 20 years in a townhouse in the city with limited parking and no yard. We love having a home and a yard for sharing with our friends and family.

Lastly, I write. During some of the worst times of my life, I wrote. I look back at some of the poems I wrote 30 years ago and remember my tortured frame of mind then. When we were preparing to move to our current home, I found shoe boxes full of notes and prayers I had written years ago that were all answered; some precisely, and some not exactly as requested, but I know God always knows best.

Ministries are not confined to the walls of the church. The world is our mission field, and abundant service opportunities exist wherever we go. We go where we are called.

There will always be others who are better communicators and organizers, more meticulous, educated, talented, and better at memorizing! The Lord looks at your heart in doing the tasks He equips you for. Our best won’t always be good enough for people, but it’s always good enough for God. Always do your best for Him.

Sometimes the season for using a particular training is over.
Sometimes it just gets rusty from lack of use and needs refreshing. Sometimes we’ve allowed overuse to cause burnout.
Sometimes He provides opportunities to learn something new.
Sometimes He knows you need to rest.

It’s all okay. Answer the call when the time is right. If you don’t know, then have faith that He does.


Serve well.

To everything there is a season and a time to every purpose under heaven. Ecclesiastes 3:1

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WALLS

What counts as an apology?

Maybe it is easier to define what an apology is not. Sincere remorse is not blaming the person you are apologizing to or others. It’s not making excuses and not shouting, “I’M SORRY!” just to say you apologized and get the other person to shut up so you can feel better about yourself. It does not require begging or tears.

An apology is an authentic expression of remorse for specific hurtful words and actions and a follow-through to avoid repeating it. It doesn’t matter if you don’t understand why the other person is upset and hurt. What matters is that you acknowledge their real pain caused by something you personally said or did, alone or with another person, whether by accident or not. Not dealing with the issue responsibly and with noble character allows the pain to fester and the dividing walls to be built higher and higher. You can climb the wall, but unless you do the right thing, the hard thing, you will never break that wall down. It will always be there.

If you have learned to see the good in all things, you might use that as an excuse to fluff over your feelings and try to let things go. But that isn’t forgiving. That’s denying, and it’s degrading to yourself. As a child of God, you are worth more than hiding your soul under a rug or being walked upon as a doormat.

What are Christ’s Followers to do?

When you’ve wronged someone, apologize and make sufficient restitution to the best of your ability. Don’t blame someone else for your behavior and words. Be sincere, knowing you are growing in humility by taking responsibility for yourself and trying to correct your wrong, if possible. Then let go.

 Saul said to Samuel, b“I have sinned, for I have transgressed the commandment of the Lord and your words, because I feared the people and obeyed their voice. 25 Now therefore, please pardon my sin and creturn with me that I may bow before the Lord.” 26 And Samuel said to Saul, “I will not return with you. dFor you have rejected the word of the Lord, eand the Lord has rejected you from being king over Israel.” 1 Samuel 15:24-26

If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to forgive us of all unrighteousness. 1 John 1:9

Therefore, if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First, be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift. Matthew 5:23-24

We learn to extend grace as God does when we forgive someone who wronged us. We learn humility. Sometimes it’s so hard, and other times, it’s very easy with someone we love, as the story of the prodigal son illustrates in Luke 15. Our challenge is to forgive the difficult people in our lives.

“When he came to his senses, he said, ‘How many of my father’s hired servants have food to spare, and here I am starving to death!  I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired servants.’  So he got up and went to his father.”

“But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him.” Luke 15:17-20

Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. Colossians 3:13

Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, and forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. Ephesians 4:32

You received Grace. Extend grace. You can do all things through Christ who strengthens you.

 

 

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LEGACY

One of my boys got his little feet caught under the accordion partition wall at church during service, and while I tried to pull him out, the wall swung back and forth. His dad had to push from the other side to free him. The boy wasn’t crying but was enjoying himself very much! He was always curious in his world of adventure.

The teen years were difficult, very challenging. I didn’t know the Lord then as I do now, and I know I would have made better decisions in those years with the wisdom of the Lord guiding me. But, I gained a new appreciation and understanding of my parents when they were trying to raise me. We are all genuinely doing our best with what we have inside of us at the time.

I pray for every parent out there who is down on themself for not being perfect, for there is no such thing. Today’s youth face challenges their parents never experienced, and parents face challenges they never dreamed of. The sooner we realize that the sooner we gain the peace to enjoy our families and have the courage and diligence to create a new legacy of honest, Christ-like love.

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SWEET CONSISTENCY

I genuinely believe there is no perfect person on earth.

So when I see people that generally defend the truth with people they don’t know, then turn around and refuse to acknowledge the truth about someone they know, it smacks of hypocrisy. I’m thinking along the lines of abuse victims.

These people will defend the victims until the abuser is someone they know. Then all of a sudden, the truth is overridden by their relationship with the abuser. Either victim shaming commences, or they simply disregard the facts because they know “he would never do that”, or worse, they think it’s okay. Folks, people are flawed, but sin should never be glossed over, no matter how well we think we know someone. God knows the heart, and we know what He thinks about man’s heart.


Love speaks the truth always. People seek the truth, and when they can’t find it or don’t want to accept it, they make it up.

“The heart is deceitful above all things, And desperately wicked; Who can know it?
Jeremiah 17:9

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LOVE

Love isn’t always what you think it should be.

Sometimes it’s messy or boring. Sometimes love is lonely. Sometimes it’s loud and sometimes silent. It often grows slowly if given the chance, or it might cool a little with time. It’s a place of comfort and familiarity that defies a chaotic world. Love has your back. It makes mistakes. It makes amends. It never settles for less than God intended.

I was reading a post about the true meaning of Valentine’s Day and sacrificial love. Valentine’s Day used to be pretty simple with flowers, candy, a card, tie, cologne, or stationery but now it seems to be more complicated with trying to find that special gift that stands out. But if you carefully observe and listen, “special” comes to you by necessity.

Marty and I celebrated the geriatric version of Valentine’s Day this year. I got him an orthopedic pillow and he got me a little heater for under my desk to keep my feet warm. We had a steak dinner here at home, watched some TV, and I fell asleep in the chair, as usual, while he manned the remote. Perfect!

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. 1 Corinthians 13:4–8

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LOST

I was searching the house for one thing.

I was going into dark corners, closets, drawers, and rooms and finding items I hadn’t seen for ages (including giant dust bunnies).
I decided to sort and discard while I am there, and finally,
I still need to find what I was initially looking for.

How many times when we are looking for somenthing in all the wrong places do we give up when we can’t find it? It’s there, somewhere.

I’m praying.

Don’t worry about anything, but pray about everything. With thankful hearts offer up your prayers and requests to God. Philippians 4:6

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RETREAT

I still remember this retreat. As I waited in line to check in after my arrival, I was behind a woman who was complaining about the wait and how the valets took her car without telling her where it was. I hoped she wasn’t going to be my roommate. I was so tired and stressed. For several years I never specified anyone to room with because I told myself I liked meeting different people. In actuality, I didn’t know anyone who was going that didn’t already have their roommates picked. As I stepped off the elevator and rounded the corner to my room, I saw a woman fumbling with her key in the door. Yep. It was her.


She continued complaining and grew quite angry in between trying to make friendly chitchat. She was very worried about her car. I excused myself to the balcony to check in with my husband. When I came back in she said she was going out and would see me later. I never saw her again. When I went back to the room after dinner and the first session, all her things were gone. She had left. I prayed for that woman who must have had some problems that I couldn’t know about from a first encounter.

I had that huge luxurious room all to myself that first night, and instead of feeling excited, I felt contemplative and alone. The next day I was assigned a new roommate who was beautiful, sweet, and friendly but because her friends were in other rooms we had little time to get to know each other. I was asleep when she came back to the room that night. I was exhausted and fragile and knew I would need my strength for the next few days. I still felt very alone.

God knew I needed rest and quiet, and to be reminded that He was in control and would provide for my needs. He also reminded me of the imperfections and complexity of others and how we are all fragile sometimes. That weekend God lovingly prepared me for the last time I would see my Mom alive.

After the retreat, I drove further into the mountains to visit and have lunch with my son Kyle and Danielle in Glenwood Springs, then back down the mountain and on to Nebraska to see my Mother who was in the last stage of her life. Five years of volunteering for hospice hadn’t prepared me for seeing my own flesh and blood in her final transition.

It was heartbreaking to see Mom looking 20 years older than she was, unresponsive most of the time with her eyes closed, but angry and combative when lucid. She had eaten very little in weeks, and as I tried to feed her some yogurt, she suddenly came back and recognized me, commenting on how much she liked my purse, which she had given me years before. She said “I did?”, then her eyes filled with tears as she looked at me, then at Dad. She asked me for a kiss and then turned her chair around and wheeled away. That was her goodbye. She left to meet Jesus a few days later, and I’m so blessed to have been a part of her journey.

I would have lost heart, unless I had believed

That I would see the goodness of the Lord

In the land of the living.

Wait on the Lord;

Be of good courage,

And He shall strengthen your heart;

Wait, I say, on the Lord! Psalm 27:13-14



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STUPID IS…

Can you finish that sentence?

If not, the whole phrase is “Stupid is as stupid does.” It has a negative connotation. The premise of this thought is your wisdom is revealed by your actions. Do you think it’s true?

I do, in some instances, like the photo above when the expected severe consequences of a person’s actions are glaringly obvious. But when there is no action, which is an action by omission, I think sometimes it indicates a lack of confidence rather than stupidity.

Sometimes when people don’t act in ways that favor our ways or make decisions that don’t come to the conclusion we covet, we surmise they are stupid when, in fact, they may be very wise.

When a lack of confidence is allowed to guide our lives, we are treated the way we teach others how to treat us.

If we don’t stand up for what is right, wrong will prevail.
If we, out of fear, don’t obey the Lord, we will miss opportunities to serve and glorify Him.
If we avoid confronting sin, in ourselves and others, it will continue without repentance.
If we let people push us down, oppression will be our portion.
If we allow abuse of any kind; discriminatory, sexual, workplace, neglect, financial, verbal, physical, or psychological, it will go on and on and on.
If we act unknowledgeable for fear of speaking up, we will be treated like a child.

God’s people, His sheep, the ones He called to Him for salvation, are described in the Bible as being enabled by the Spirit of God to do all things according to His will. We are His bride!

Our confidence comes from Him.
Our strength comes from Him.
Our power comes from Him.
Our love comes from Him.
Our freedom comes from Him.
Our help comes from Him.
Our peace comes from Him.
Our righteousness comes from Him.
Our courage comes from Him.
Our wisdom comes from Him.
Our humility comes from Him.
Our discernment comes from Him.

Keep looking up with faith, wisdom, and confidence in Jesus! God doesn’t make junk, and He doesn’t make mistakes. We are His chosen people, never walked upon like a dirty rug, but standing with our heads held high and eyes raised toward the path He leads. We are never alone.

Praise God!

Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need. Hebrews 4:16

So we say with confidence, “The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can mere mortals do to me?” Hebrews 13:6

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10

Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9

When all our enemies heard about this, all the surrounding nations were afraid and lost their self-confidence, because they realized that this work had been done with the help of our God. Nehemiah 6:16

With him is only the arm of flesh, but with us is the LORD our God to help us and to fight our battles.” And the people gained confidence from what Hezekiah the king of Judah said. 2 Chronicles 32:8

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. Psalm 139:13,14

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HEALING

Real healing.

Hidden wounds don’t always fester in ways that are related to the harm. This goes far beyond physical illness. It’s a sickness of the soul. People are good actors and sometimes project the effects of their wounds onto other people as they claim spotlessness.

Healing will not happen as long as the scab covers the deeper infection.

It’s not fun to let it get so bad the pain is unbearable. Read your Bible. Go to Jesus and humbly and honestly assess your life, giving it all to Him, and ask Him to heal your brokenness.

Then Yeshua said to His disciples, “If anyone wants to follow after Me, he must deny himself, take up his cross, and follow Me.” Matthew 16:24

…to make her holy, having cleansed her by immersion in the word. Ephesians 5:26

But we all, with unveiled face beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory—just as from the Lord, who is the Spirit. 2 Corinthians 3:18

Our hope is in the Lord!

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ENCOURAGEMENT

“One of the most sincere forms of respect is actually listening to what another has to say.” – Bryant H. McGill

Behaviorists say people who listen and express an interest in the other person instead of talking about themselves are usually perceived as more likable.

They also say simply smiling more has the same effect, whether you are a nice person or not. Don’t most of us think we are nice people? Why aren’t we all smiling? I’ve heard smiling makes fewer wrinkles than frowning so there’s that!

It’s also a great show of respect to allow people to enjoy their accomplishments without unsolicited advice on how they could do things the way you would do them. That is a form of condescension that can dull their joy. Why?

In a world full of fierce competition, encouragement is highly underrated! This people thing is hard! I know I have to tame the urge to insert my opinion far more than I should, but it’s worth the effort to keep still to see someone else shine. There’s a reason the Bible tells us to be encouragers to each other.

Ephesians 4:29 says, “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.”

Let’s be sincere encouragers, and if you can’t, then do what Grandma said and don’t say anything at all. We can do this.

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BORED

I don’t remember being bored as a kid.

Living on the farm where there weren’t any other kids my age to play with, I usually found things to do outside by myself. This was when I learned how much I love animals. I had dogs, cats, rabbits, fish, a tiny turtle from Woolworths, a salamander named Sally, baby raccoons, and rescued baby birds. I even hatched a baby bird in an Easter basket on top of the warm television on Easter Sunday. I also had a mean pet rooster. He disappeared around the time when we got invited over to the neighbors for a fried chicken dinner.

I tried to dig to China. I built tents on the clothesline and playhouse floorplans out of rocks. I tried to get lost in the cornfield, lay in the tall grass in the pasture, watched the clouds, and did “scientific experiments” that probably weren’t such a good idea. Still, God had me covered and kept me safe. I watched the baby pigs and once tried to save one that was being crushed by its mother. I had a rock collection under my bed that was mainly pretty gravel.

I learned to love reading and often searched the encyclopedia for fun topics. I created art projects that I came up with myself, sometimes getting ideas from Highlights Magazine. I enjoyed looking through the JC Penney, Sears, and Montgomery Ward “Wish Books”, circling my choices for Santa. I made Christmas trees out of magazines with the pages folded over. I climbed the neighbor’s apple tree. Sometimes I just sat outside and observed my surroundings. During one of these times of quiet contemplation at around age 10, I became acutely aware of God’s presence in my life and that I had a soul. Sometimes I was afraid. 

My freedom as a child allowed me to become responsible for my entertainment and grow in self-sufficiency, perhaps too much. I lacked social skills and was known by many as spoiled with a lack of self-control while simultaneously withdrawing into myself for safety. While one person might scold me for my rowdy behavior, another might try to draw me out and tell me to play with the others. It was confusing to me.  

Later, I learned that a trusting dependence on someone who gently guides and protects us in our youth opens the door to trusting a loving God to direct our adult paths. Some of us have to go through a living hell before we can admit and submit. We must acknowledge that our self-sufficiency is a farce and submit to the sovereignty of God over our lives. Therein lies the difference between a sad life full of self-love or hate, and a fruitful life teeming with the love of God.  

Never bored.

Do not put your trust in princes—in man, in whom there is no salvation. His breath departs, he returns to his dust. In that very day, his plans perish. Happy is he whose help is the God of Jacob, whose hope is in Adonai his God, Psalm 146:3-5 TLV

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MEMORY

Something I noticed about my mom in her last years battling Alzheimer’s and other health problems, was her ability to remember things that happened long ago while forgetting the simple things in the present. It seemed so odd. But when you think about it, don’t we tend to ingrain those experiences and words that affect our lives the most deeply?

I believe those old memories are held in our memory banks, only coming out when they are jogged and allowed by our minds. They can be gifts to treasure, or burdens locked away until they are given to the Lord for safekeeping.

I never thought I’d hear myself say it…in her fragile state, Mom exhibited this truth.

She knew.

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GHOSTED

Have you ever ghosted someone or been ghosted? I have on both counts.

This article touches on a subject that is more complicated than presented. There are several possible reasons for ghosting that aren’t listed.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/stuck/202108/7-reasons-why-even-close-friends-could-ghost-us

Firstly, if I haven’t heard from someone in a while, I message them. Facebook has an algorithm that makes it so I can see the posts of only a small portion of the people on my friend list. If you don’t see them any more, it is possible they aren’t seeing your posts either.

Sometimes people are just curious. They want to know about your life but don’t really want to nurture a friendship online or otherwise. I get that. But I don’t collect friends. Why gather a slew of people on your friends list if you don’t participate? That just seems a little one-sided and well, strange.

If I ask someone to connect on Facebook it’s because I have some other connection to them. Occasionally, I will friend a stranger if they have requested and we have mutual friends, but I first verify the relationship to weed out any posers and fake accounts.

At one point, someone I had been online friends with for several years was posting some things that bothered me.They just didn’t sit right, and I started to pull away. I was hesitant to tell her why when she asked because she was a highly educated professional, and she was in grief, as was I. I didn’t want to deal with it then, nor did I want to hurt her. At her insistence, I reluctantly and I thought gently, told her what was bothering me. It was a disaster. She put me in my lowly place, and that was that.There were no opportunities for further discussion, apologies, or closure.

Sometimes people ghost because it’s the right thing to do when their priorities have changed, but they don’t want to tell you because they think it might upset you. Instead of being kind, it hurts with uncertainty.

When the ONLY time you hear from a person is when they have something negative to say or disagree with you, they might get ghosted.

If you interact with a friend’s posts, but they don’t respond in kind, or at least wish you a happy birthday or congrats on milestones, they might get ghosted.

If you know they are close to people who have hurt you and talked about you behind your back, yup, they might get ghosted.

If you are vicious, racist, or chronically rude, you might get ghosted. Most of us have bad days, but those are the times we learn to take a break from social media so we don’t bring others down. There is absolutely no good reason to humiliate or disrespect a friend or family member on social media. If you allow your friends to verbally attack, threaten, disrespect, and shout at another friend without stepping in to stop it, you will get ghosted.

Political and religious issues won’t get you ghosted unless you start making them personal with name-calling and other forms of disrespect. If you’re a professed Christian who chronically takes the Lord’s name in vain and disrespects Him without care or remorse on social media, you might get ghosted. If I speak the truth in love and you continue, I will say a quick prayer for you, then you will get ghosted. It’s that simple. It makes my stomach turn.

We teach people how to treat us. Never has that been more evident to me than in the last few years. So often, when we don’t set boundaries in real-time and online, we get run over and manipulated, mentally and emotionally. Then when we finally do set boundaries, we may be verbally attacked, ignored, unfriended, or even blocked completely.

I know some decisive, strong souls who advise against social media participation at all, but the fact is, social media is here to stay. Even with all its complexities and potential to do harm, it serves a purpose. Social media primarily provides a venue for good interaction and communication with our tribe: the people who have love and care for us and with whom we have interests in common.

Our job is to wisely use it and learn to set boundaries in love. It’s not easy at all.

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EMBARRASSED

THE CUTEST LITTLE EMBARRASSMENT EVER!

I’ve discovered there are two types of people at the dog park:

The ones who are horrified that you don’t do something about your dog’s disgusting behavior, and the ones who say, “Don’t worry. They’re dogs, and that’s what dogs do.”

Finding the middle ground with wisdom is my goal.

Presently, our dog Dandy has decided he likes the taste of urine. He follows his brother so closely he almost gets a wet head, then he licks the spot and his brother. I noticed that afterward, his senses seemed overloaded as his lips twitched, kind of like Hannibal Lecter thinking of his next meal with a side of fava beans and Chianti.

It was at the dog park the other day when another dog peed on the concrete, and Dandy started licking it and grossed everyone out that I hoped this was a temporary adolescent phase that would go away. So embarrassing, but you know what? We all are an embarrassment at certain points in our lives. Usually, our younger years find us with more pride at the chagrin we’ve caused others than ourselves. It’s all part of growing up and finding our way.

The wise parent knows those years are fleeting, and unless it involves a serious infraction, it’s relatively harmless. Eventually, maturity sets in, and a different kind of pride evolves in knowing everybody made it through. There is no middle ground for humans to enjoy their immaturity.

There is a quote attributed to John Wayne,
“Life is hard. It’s harder if you’re stupid”.

All I can say is, yes, it is, but it doesn’t have to last forever if we don’t want it. A collection of 66 books called The Holy Bible gives us all the instructions and encouragement we need to grow and mature in life, spiritually, mentally, physically, and in our relationships. People don’t have to suffer in their foolishness if they are humbled, repentant, and willing to learn a better way from Jesus Christ.

It’s highly recommended.

When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with the humble is wisdom. Proverbs 11:2

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BEAUTIFUL

My husband thinks I’m beautiful inside and out.
Those words, which surprised me, make me want to live up to them.

Click here for a story on how to be an “Eight Cow Wife” (or Husband).
https://journeytojoy.tv/eight-cow-wife/

The world can be a cruel place. People you trust can hurt you. Loyalty can be nonexistent or misplaced. Kindness and compassion may be offered only to those who have “earned” it.

The Bible calls us to be different than we were. It calls us to be different from the ways of the world. We are to be merciful and forgiving. There’s a lot of pride in the unmerciful heart because it hasn’t been humbled. The unmerciful heart thinks its pain will be lessened by sharing it. Instead, it’s multiplied and intensified.

I don’t want my legacy to be about perfection, but instead a fractured soul buffered against the hard realities of life by God’s forgiveness, mercy, love, and grace, and extending the same to others.

When Satan tempts us to retaliate in pain and frustration, we can step back, take a deep breath, and prayerfully exhale to the Father.

And like a wisp, the temptation blows away.

Be beautiful. Be different. Be His.

“No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation, he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it” 1 Corinthians 10:13

On reaching the place, he said to them, “Pray that you will not fall into temptation.” Luke 22:40

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BEAUTY

Recently, I joined a group on social media geared toward aging gracefully. I had high hopes of finding makeup tips that don’t sink into the creases of my face and how to avert the inevitable aches and pains of an aging body. Generally, I know how to make the most of what I have to look and feel my best. I hoped trading encouragement with others in the same boat to Geriatric Island would be emotionally lucrative.

The day I joined the group, it immediately became apparent I had walked onto the boat to Alcatraz. The insensitive comments and unasked-for criticism of other women’s choices and appearance were appalling, even down to their God-given features. I watched as a couple of new ladies tentatively posted their photos to the group, only to become overwhelmed by the responses, some of which were cruel and sarcastic. They left the group to lick their wounds on the day they joined.

Why do we place so much emphasis on looks? Is it because that’s our first impression when we meet people? What about the people we already know? Do we pick apart their choices?

In a kinder time, it was considered rude to comment on another person’s style or looks unless it was a compliment. Even then, the mention might not be appreciated. Not everyone wants or needs to be noticed by others. At the same time, some people crave attention because somewhere along the line of life, they feel invisible.

Watching the drama unfold made me realize how fragile we are and how even the simplest mishandled words can shatter souls and hope. Deep down, we will always remain children affected by bullies and those who inadvertently hurt us. Some learn to manage their feelings and come off as poised and mature, but others continue to struggle with the impulses of their youth of fight or flight. I think we are tired of fighting and choose to fly away with our broken wings, more often than not.

Is it wrong to want to look our best? Do we admire others for their inner beauty, no matter what our discerning eyes think of how they look on the outside? Do we subtly put others down because they’ve taken the time to look their best while making excuses about not having the time for such things? Does any of it even matter?

I ask questions of myself as well as of you. I wanted to know what the Bible says, and here is what I found:

You are altogether beautiful, my love; there is no flaw in you.
Song of Solomon 4:7
A wife is beautiful inside and out to her husband, who loves her.

Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.
1 Peter 3:3-4
Gentleness and a quiet spirit are classic and timeless beauty. Regardless of stature and wealth, these attributes are attainable for anyone who wants them. Jesus will help you.

Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
Proverbs 31:30
A woman who thinks she is beautiful because the world tells her she is might be full of pride and act accordingly toward others. A person can let any accolades regarding her “beauty,” including inner beauty, go to her head.

Have you ever had a lovely person blurt out an insult in their effort to “help”? I have. It’s a little shocking. Giving the benefit of the doubt helps, but if it continues, you might wonder why someone who knows better keeps doing it.

Confident people can ignore the rudeness, but some sweet souls take it to heart. The sensitive soul needs an apology, love, and encouragement, not continued criticism for “misunderstanding” or being so touchy. That’s not YHWH’s heart.

I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.
Psalm 139:14
Humble confidence is beautiful. It knows God made you just the way you are, and He doesn’t make mistakes.

Likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire,
1 Timothy 2:9
Women and men should dress appropriately to worship God, not drawing attention to themselves. It’s not a style mandate as much as an examination of motives. “Look at me” doesn’t belong in worship. In Biblical times, braided hair was considered an expensive luxury that took time. Today, it is much more common, as is wearing jewelry. Walking into a room over or underdressed is uncomfortable, but modesty and self-control will always be appropriate.

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.
Philippians 4:8
God first.
Think of others before yourself.
Be humble.
Give praise and encouragement.

What if nothing is honorable, just, pure, lovely, commendable, excellent, or praiseworthy?

Just be kind.

You don’t have to say anything at all.

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CONNECT

I’m not so old I don’t remember my younger years. I remember them like they were yesterday, and I remember my fears and plans and feelings.

You always hope to use what you have learned to help the ones who come after you, but for some reason, they want to learn for themselves in their own way and time. Sometimes it’s painful to watch.

“The beginning of men’s rebellion against God was, and is, the lack of a thankful heart.” Francis Schaeffer

I can imagine it is also very painful for the Father to watch us as we struggle through life making choices and decisions that aren’t good for us or our relationship with Him. Connection is a two way street. It takes two willing people.

Help us God to connect with each other.

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TRUST

Trust is precious and pure.

It’s there from the very beginning of life when a babe looks to her parents for care and love. If eroded away by circumstances, dishonesty, manipulation and mistreatment, it’s very difficult to get back.

I think that’s the world we live in now, and time after time our instincts prove us wise to be cautious. I wish it wasn’t so. Oh, to have the unburdened trusting heart of a child again.

My full trust is in Jesus Christ alone. He is my shield of protection and my light in the darkness through which I can still see a glimmer of good…if I squint, with eyes wide open.

And those who know Your name will put their trust in You;
For You, Lord, have not forsaken those who seek You. Psalm 9:10

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LAUNDRY

How To Line Dry Clothes » Housewife How-Tos®
http://www.housewifehowtos.com

Sentimental Saturday:

I have a long-ago memory of when I was in first grade. A little boy in my class had the freshest, most beautiful, clean-smelling clothes, and I would discretely sniff his shirt while standing behind him in line! 😁 Because this was back in the nineteen sixties, I imagine his mother used bleach to clean and sanitize his clothes, as well as hung them on the line to dry.

I was reminded of this memory when someone asked me what the best smelling laundry detergent is. I believe nothing developed compares to the simplicity of bleach and God’s beautiful sunshine.

Oh, to have a clothesline…

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UP

No description available.

I found these little graphics for a dollar at the discount store. I set them on top of my dining room hutch thinking it would be a daily reminder to start my day with right priorities. Some days I forget to look up.

When I’m having a difficult day and find myself complaining and hurting, I know I forgot to look up.

When I am envying and doubting, I know I forgot to look up.

When I’m angry and tormented, I know I forgot to look up.

When all I want to do is argue and win, I know I forgot to look up.

When my heart is broken and I’m feeling hopeless, I know I forgot to look up.

When my words are cutting and I justify them, I know I forgot to look up.

When I make excuses for my mistakes, I know I forgot to look up.

When I know I’m wrong and need to apologize but don’t, I know I forgot to look up.

When I want revenge, I know I forgot to look up.

When I’m thoughtless with my words and actions, I know I forgot to look up.

When I get tired of helping, I know I forgot to look up.

When the heart of another takes a backseat to my own, I know I forgot to look up.

When love seems so far away, I know I forgot to look up.

I don’t need to move the message lower to see it.

I just need to look up.

Rejoice always, pray constantly,
 in everything give thanks;
for this is God’s will for you in Messiah Yeshua. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

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FRESH

No description available.
Grandma Ferne

My beautiful African Violets remind me of Grandma Ferne, who raised and propagated them in her home for many years. I love the fresh touch of nature, especially when the new year commences with frigid temperatures as it ushers out the old.

In the last few years, I’ve chosen a word to focus on each year that will hopefully help keep me centered on a path of growth in my faith. Two years ago, the word was “trust” which was put to the test as I saw several friends pass through the veil in God’s timing, not mine, and as we answered the call to move several hundred miles from the place we called home for 35 years.

Last year the word was “Submission”. When most people hear that word, they first think of the biblical submission of a wife toward her husband. For Christ-followers, it goes beyond that definition to the goal of submission to the will of God in our lives. I am consciously aware of my daily choices and seek to bring honor to Him in my decisions.

This year my focus will be “Onward” by placing the past in its rightful place: a stepping stone to learning new, honorable, and productive ways while putting my weaknesses and the less admirable behind. I want my work and words to flourish with the encouragement and love of the Lord. For the benefit of others, I want the barriers of the past to dissove.

The beauty of a fresh start in a new year doesn’t cover the ugliness of the previous, but it does spark the hope of new beginnings.

Count your blessings every day, for they are a spark of hope with each new sunrise.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

This is the day which the Lord has made;
Let us rejoice and be glad in it.
Psalm 118:24

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KIND

Reprinted by approval of author

“Just be kind”.

What does that mean? Maybe it would be better to list what it isn’t. I know I need a reminder myself sometimes

Impatience
Sarcasm
Namecalling
Humiliating
Disrespectful
Ridiculing
Speaking over without listening
Hating
Rejecting
Shouting
Apathic
Harshness
Oppressing
Unrighteous Anger
Unrelenting Criticism
Lack of Remorse
Blaming
Shaming

Some people think unkindness makes them better, stronger, funnier, more effective, and well-rounded, but it doesn’t. They already know that, because most people tend to reflect their upbringing and life experiences whether they intend to or not, and they know how it feels to be treated unkindly by others.

It’s easy to spread pain along a path of apathy, but it’s better to do the hard thing and be who we know we aren’t, putting the feelings of others ahead of our own emotional needs because it’s the kind thing to do.

What if we skip the knee-jerk impulse and first ask ourselves, “Why do I feel the need to hurt another person? How can I be kind instead?”. Would the results be far more beneficial to everyone? Loving discipline doesn’t create malice. It creates honor, respect, and wisdom. Pain isn’t a requirement to teach life lessons for those who have known love.

Let kindness have a shot. Kindness softens the blows of the world and will soften your heart in practice.

In humility, let love prevail.

He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.
Micah 6:8

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RESPECT

We don’t kill the Wolf Spiders. They are big and scary looking but they kill the deceptively dainty and venomous Black Widows.

“Every living being deserves respect, but children, animals, and the elderly deserve protection.”

Someone commented this and I considered the words carefully. I often hear that respect must be earned and I ask myself, “Do I respect every living being”? How can I respect a person who does heinous things on purpose, or harms people while lifting others, or abuses the innocent?

I think this is the dilemma a lot of people struggle with. When is the line crossed that allows for protection over consideration? When does one man’s need and wants override the need and desires of another? Whose family comes first? Is it biblical to have respect for everyone? I went to the Bible.

Honor all people. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honor the king.
1 Peter 2:17

I learned that honor is a fundamental value placed upon each person as a child of God created in His image. It’s SOUL VALUE, knowing we all started the same with no physical restrictions or definitions, but having an intrinsic need for a Savior. We all have this need. At about the age of one, it starts to become subtly obvious.

The brotherhood is the body of Christian believers. You will know them by their fruits. Not that they are perfect and sinless, but because they know they aren’t. They turn away from sin. They don’t give up and live their lives in the flesh because perfection is impossible, and they don’t abuse God’s patience. They feel their need for a Savior intimately and don’t take His forgiveness, mercy, and grace for granted.

Children, let no one mislead you! The one who practices righteousness is righteous, just as Yeshua is righteous. The one who practices sin is of the devil, for the devil has been sinning from the beginning. Ben-Elohim appeared for this purpose—to destroy the works of the devil. No one born of God practices sin, because God’s seed remains in him. He cannot sin, because he is born of God. Loving Children Emulate His Actions.
It is clear who are the children of God and who are the children of the devil by this—anyone who does not act righteously or love his brother is not of God. 1 John 3:7-10

Fear in this context means respect. Respect God and be obedient to His Precepts. God’s commandments are the way of wisdom. Hindsight can be very painful when we choose to ignore and disrespect God.

We honor authority because God has placed those in power by way of His allowance. Trust the Lord’s all-knowing wisdom, but keep in mind that those in leadership also come under God’s authority, and His commandments cancel orders against them. Our opinions and wishes are powerless in the grand scheme of God’s plan, but He hears us!

That’s why we pray that His Will be done and for the strength to accept and follow through on our part in a way that is pleasing to Him. That’s our choice.

What if we don’t know what His Will is? For now, we do, because we trust Him.

Praying.

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HOLY

God is holy. We are not.

Never has it been brought home as clearly to me when I was a caregiver that people are closest to seeing the holiness of God when they are in a fragile state, and Satan knows it.

Twenty years ago, after trudging through a mucky decade of my life, I came out on the other side and felt a calling to give back to the world out of gratitude to the Lord. My church had a Stephen Ministry program that trained caregivers to biblically minister to the grieving, hurting, confused, and sick. I prayed about this because, mind you, this was a massive step of faith for me. I was used to being the needy one, not the one called upon to help. But I learned worldly neediness is diminished in helpers who rely on the Lord for their strength and guidance.

After interviews, two other women and I began the 40-hour training that included monthly continuing accountability and support meetings with more seasoned Stephen Ministers. As caregivers, we “ministered” to the people matched to us by the coordinator. Over the next three years, I helped a new divorcee, a woman raising her grandson because his parents were addicts, and a mother navigating the world of teenagers. All were angry and fearful, and some felt guilt. I could empathize.

Later, I spent five years volunteering in hospice care. This ministry also was a calling I would never have chosen for myself because I had minimal experience with dying people close up, only from a distance. 

I wondered why God led me to do this? What if I say the wrong thing? What if I’m repulsed instead of loving? Fast forward 3 1/2 years to Mary, my last hospice care receiver, a tiny black woman with a sweet smile. I wrote about Mary in this 2018 blog post titled “Blessed Are The Merciful”. 

“Blessed are the mercifu…

On the day Mary left to be with the Lord, she was lying in her bed, wide-eyed and confused. Her daughter was there along with her husband and the chaplain. After visiting Mary almost every Saturday for a year and a half, Mary’s homecoming day was when I first met her family. As soon as she saw me, she reached out and smiled. Even if she didn’t know who I was, she knew I was the one who played her favorite 40’s music, decorated her room, drove her outside and around the hallways in her wheelchair, and sat with her while she ate lunch. She knew I was there for her. I loved her, and paid my respects at her funeral a week later, sitting conspicuously in the back. No one knew who I was.

Mary went to be with the Lord in August 2011. In 2012, my mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s Disease and died in November 2017.  In His sovereignty, God knew what was ahead.

I learned through volunteering that we could teach and bless others and learn and be blessed by those abiding in the most vulnerable of places.  

God prepares us and orchestrates for His highest good. He makes sure everyone has something to give, even if it’s to warn us how NOT to live our lives.

In our humble condition, we are the closest we will get to holiness on this side of the veil without the Holy Spirit to help us.

If you are questioning and wondering why the Lord is leading you in a direction that seems strange and impossible, trust the Lord. Even if you are being discouraged, lack encouragement, and have no confidence, trust the Lord. Read God’s Word. Ask a trusted, biblically-sound friend, and continue praying for clarity. That ‘yes’ may actually contain a ‘wait’ clause.

 “as obedient children, not conforming yourselves to the former lusts, as in your ignorance; 15 but as He who called you is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct, 16 because it is written, “Be holy, for I am holy.” 1 Peter 1:14-16

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TIME

No description available.

A friend once said that when couples marry, one family is usually more dominant than the other. I can see the truth in that statement, especially when blended families are involved. One family has close extended familial relationships, and the other doesn’t. Some have the means to travel, and others all live locally. People get along, and people don’t. It happens.

Holidays are trying for families who jump through hoops to accommodate everyone’s plans. I remember. Still, sometimes it seems like one family consistently gets the short end of the stick. It’s not fair, but how they handle their slighted feelings is the difference between being considered or left behind. We know.

Hopefully, we’ve raised our children to grow into considerate adults who love their parents and want to spend time with us. Even if the gift of time isn’t offered, a simple note or phone call on a special occasion or holiday can heal wounds, intentional or not. Some people have done everything right, had loving relationships with their children, and been surprised at how quickly and efficiently they were left coughing in the dust. Nothing makes sense to explain it. My heart goes out to them.

If you are a member of the favored family, think about how it would feel to be on the other side of the fence and how you would respond. Could you resolve to share these precious people with others who love them? Inviting the other family to your home is kind and generous. But please remember every family deserves to keep their own traditions alive and spend time alone with their loved ones in their own way.

The gift of time is precious. I know it’s hard to hear when you are already stressing, but it’s like slapping your family in the face at Christmas to eat a meal that took hours to prepare, open presents, and run in two hours. It’s even more hurtful to forget your family completely. If you can’t spend a few hours, maybe it would be better to choose another day to celebrate. It really doesn’t matter when, you know, because the Spirit of Christ is alive in the love you share together. Parents’ hearts are full when they are gifted with your presence (not presents), and when that’s not logistically possible? Please call!

For those who are feeling forgotten and alienated for any reason, don’t suffer in silence. Reach out and look for ways to serve in the lives of others. You are not alone by any stretch of the imagination. By focusing on others, the pain in your heart will be lessened, and healing can commence.

In those instances when the situation seems permanent, leave the door ajar for those who shut you out because, in their absence, their lives are a mystery to you. Someday they might need you to be the hand of Jesus if they come calling. What an honor that would be.

In the meantime, live righteously in body, mind, and spirit. Keep praying. That peace you crave will come.

“Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? For even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good to those who are doing good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do this. And if you lend to those from whom you expect to take, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners in order to receive back the same.” Luke 7:31-34 TLV

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PRAYER

Dear Lord, thank you for this day.

We are blessed because You are a forgiving and understanding God. You have already done so much for us, and yet you keep on blessing us.

Help us start the day with a new attitude and plenty of gratitude, and let us take the best of each day to quiet our minds so we can hear from You.

Let us not whine about things over which we have no control. Let us continue to see sin through God’s eyes and acknowledge it as evil. And when we sin, let us repent, and confess with our mouths our wrongdoing, and receive the forgiveness of God. Please heal us, Father.

Continue to use us and bless us that we may be a blessing to others. Keep us strong that we may help the weak. Uplift and inspire us that we may have words of encouragement for others.

We pray for those who are lost and can’t find their way. We pray for those who are misjudged and misunderstood. We pray for those who are caught up in religion and don’t know Jesus intimately. We pray for those who don’t believe, but we thank you that we do. You never give up on us.

We pray for those who don’t know their worth. We pray these fragile folks don’t listen to the stinging disregard and evil lies flung at them to bring them down. May they accept to their very core that they are precious in your sight and worthy of all the good things you have in store for them.

We pray for the church and the fellowship and every member of their households. We pray for peace, love, and joy in their homes and that you provide for their needs. You are the most excellent Provider, Lord.

We pray that those who cause strife and discord within the body remember that we are all one in Christian unity, none better than another, and called to encourage, exhort, disciple, serve, and love each other.

When this world closes in on us, remind us of Jesus’ example; to slip away and find a quiet place to pray. It’s the best response when we’re pushed to our limits. When we can’t find the words, you already know our longings. Help us to be patient as we wait for your answer. May we learn to accept all things according to God’s will.

We pray that every eye reading this knows there is no problem or circumstance greater than God, and every battle is His to fight when we hand it over. What a relief it is to realize that He has already won!

As we go about our day and into the night, bless us, Lord, with your peace and presence and the wisdom that only comes from knowing You intimately.

Thank you, Heavenly Father.

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CARDS

Are you one of those people? You know, a card hoarder. I think it could be genetic.

My grandmas saved shoeboxes full of precious cards and notes given to them by friends and family over the years. One grandma had every birthday and anniversary of her kids and grandkids penned on the wall calendar in the kitchen. She had a stash of all occasion cards, and I don’t remember Grandma forgetting any of her four kids and their spouses, eleven grandkids, and four great-grandkids’ birthdays until her last years.

When my grandparents passed, the family found many of these tucked away old cards and letters, bringing back memories, love and laughter, and the answers to long-held questions for those who craved knowing more about their family history.

As a child, we lived on the farm, and it was a big deal to go to town to do the shopping. I got an allowance for chores from an early age and learned to save for gifts. It wasn’t a lot of money, but things didn’t cost as much back then. Dad usually ended up with Aqua Velva and a tie every year. Many farmers wear them, you know. Mom would get a pretty necklace or embroidered handkerchief from Woolworth’s discount store. If there was any money left, my little brother might get a trinket. I usually saved for something bigger for myself, like one of those tiny turtles eventually banned from being sold because children were contracting salmonella from them. It’s a wonder I’m alive.

Anyway, if I didn’t make one, picking out the perfect card was serious business for me. I would go to the drug store and scan all the cards for just the right one for whom I was buying.

I remember one year, I must have been around eight years old and spent a considerable amount of time browsing the cards for Mother’s Day, and the card I picked out cost a dime over what I had in my pocket. I scanned the cards again to find the second-best, but my heart was set on the first one because it was the right message. I counted my money again to make sure. Sigh. As I walked away to pay for second-best, I saw a glint out of the corner of my eye, bent down, and picked up a dime that was on the floor partially hidden by the display rack. Happy doesn’t even begin to describe my good fortune that I still remember 52 years later. I cared that much about the message and so did God.

When we moved last year, I sorted through cards, letters, and old handwritten prayers from decades ago. It was fun to read my detailed petitions and marvel at how God answered them. They brought back memories of lean times, uncertainty, my grandparents, pain, helping people, Mother’s Day when my children were little, birthdays, anniversaries, apologies, thank you’s, and singing songs long forgotten. Some were store-bought, but the most cherished of all were the sentiments scribbled on a scrap of paper by a child’s hand.

Occasionally, I’ll find a note in one of my bibles or a book that comes at a time when the message or memory is dearly needed. For a moment, I’m taken back in time and encouraged with love and hope. Sometimes that’s all it takes to change the path of the day and fill me with humble gratitude.

So if you are a note and card keeper, I encourage you to be selective. While old messages of encouragement and love are comforting and welcome, anything less than should be sifted carefully. Your heart matters. Cover it with loving words. We want to move forward with joy, not stall while looking behind.

God cares about the messages you keep.

“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”  Philippians 4:8

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THIS DAY

THE MILLION DOLLAR QUESTION

Thirty-one years ago, after two weeks of sobriety in a treatment program, while watching the 700 Club with Pat Robertson on television, I chose this day to come to Jesus in complete submission, and on my knees, humbly admitted my sinfulness and asked for forgiveness. Jesus welcomed me with open arms that were full of love, and yes, He forgave and saved me from myself and eternal damnation. Never in my life had I ever felt the feelings that followed this gift. Suffice it to say, no drug, drink, or vice could ever compare!

I learned over the years that my faith should not be based upon feelings because feelings are not always factual. Seven years after this day of rejoicing, I relapsed for a short time. I wasn’t spending time with Jesus, and I didn’t have people in my life to remind me. I didn’t know how to follow Him on my own. I didn’t realize that reading His Word would shine a light on His path for me to walk on. Now, I nurture my relationship with the Lord, protecting my mental, emotional, and physical well-being. I’m assured of God’s love daily by reading the Bible and spending time with Him in prayer. In the past, when I had to be at work by 6 AM, my feet hit the floor by 4 AM so I had time to begin my day with Jesus. I fellowship with other believers who hold me accountable and remind me that God is in control and I am not. I love hearing how God works all things for good in the lives of others through their testimonies and encouragement!

Psalm 51:3-19 says, “Be gracious to me, O God, according to Your mercy. According to Your great compassion blot out my transgressions.
Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity and cleanse me from my sin.
For I know my transgressions and my sin is ever before me. Against You, You only, have I sinned, and done what is evil in Your sight, so that You are just when You speak, and blameless when You judge. Behold, I was born in iniquity and in sin when my mother conceived me. Surely You desire truth in the inner being. Make me know wisdom inwardly.
Cleanse me with hyssop and I will be clean. Wash me, and I will be whiter than snow. Let me hear joy and gladness, so the bones You crushed may rejoice. Hide Your face from my sins, and blot out all my iniquities.
Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me.
Do not cast me from Your presence— take not Your Ruach ha-Kodesh from me. Restore to me the joy of Your salvation and sustain me with a willing spirit. Then will I teach transgressors Your ways and sinners will return to You. Deliver me from bloodguilt, O God— God of my salvation. Then my tongue will sing for joy of Your righteousness.
O Lord, open my lips, and my mouth will declare Your praise.
For You would not delight in sacrifice, or I would give it, nor be pleased by burnt offerings. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit. A broken and a contrite heart, O God, You will not despise.

Even in the tough times, and there will always be times of pain, turmoil, sadness, and injustice until we are in Heaven, God sustains us and gives us hope when we trust Him. If you have ever wanted someone to take the load off your shoulders, God is the One. His shoulders are broad.

But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint. Isaiah 40:31

You won’t be sorry.

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ROCK

Just as I can’t invalidate the feelings and first-hand experiences of others, they cannot invalidate mine.

Feelings and experiences are subjective and personal, which is why faith cannot be dependent upon them. Even scientific objectivity is fluid and constantly changing. A doctor once told me medicine isn’t an exact science. Well, that wasn’t reassuring to me! If science depends on fallible man’s perception and evaluation, how is it ever exact?

The Holy Bible, as the Living Word of God, has stood the test of time for those who love Jesus. Science can’t disprove it but instead is supporting biblical authenticity and reliability.

https://biblearchaeology.org/research/topics/amazing-discoveries-in-biblical-archaeology/4852-important-biblical-archaeological-discoveries-in-2021-an-update-from-dr-bryant-wood

Scientific Evidence

https://www.icr.org/article/modern-scientific-discoveries-verify-scriptures/

https://www.sciencemeetsreligion.org/theology/bible-archaeology.php

Our perceptions may question and threaten to cause doubt in our minds. But through faith and God’s Word and even scientific discoveries, we can know in our hearts that God is in control, always loving, protecting, and guiding for good.

Thank you, Lord, for being the constant in my life.

You are my rock.

“There is no one holy like the LORD; there is no one besides you; there is no Rock like our God.” 1 Samuel 2:2

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PRESSING ON

In response to someone who asked why so many older couples are selling their homes and moving to places far away from their families to spend retirement:

I lived away from my family for over 35 years for various reasons, primarily job-related. Our children didn’t grow up knowing their extended families. We learned to live our lives independently, sometimes only seeing our families once a year on holidays or even less. In this absence, we created our own traditions. We didn’t have built-in free babysitters for going out. No big vacations, we camped. Rarely eating out, I cooked. I cut my kids’ hair, we wore second-hand clothes, and for years I made a lot of the gifts we gave.  You do what you have to and make do.

The best explanation I have for why we decided to move is God opened a door, and we gratefully grabbed at the opportunity to walk through it. We lived 35 years in Colorado. Now that we are almost to retirement age and our kids are all grown, we decided it was time to start over in a little warmer climate, in a more centralized location to our families, where it’s more affordable to live out the rest of our years. 

Most people are happy for us. We haven’t been treated very well by some. Others are just curious as to “Why?” because we now live in Oklahoma in a more rural area with a slower lifestyle and horses, cows, and steers as our neighbors down the road. On the other hand, you won’t meet friendlier people, and there is something to be said for a land covered with an abundance of tree species, wildlife, water, and green everywhere. It’s a different kind of beauty from Colorado’s mountains. Still, for a body and mind parched from the crowds and arid insignificance, it may not be for everybody but it’s an oasis of respite for us until the Lord calls us home.

I sometimes miss the old holiday gatherings from long ago with all the grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins, but this is a much different world in which we live. It was prophesied to be this way and has been in the works for centuries. Our dependence needs to be on the Lord, not our parents, children, families, or other entities. God is the Sustainer. 

Frankly, I don’t know how I would have made it through the thick of life without Him, but

I am looking forward, not behind.

Not that I have already obtained this or been perfected, but I press on if only I might take hold of that for which Messiah Yeshua took hold of me. Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself as having taken hold of this. But this one thing I do: forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal for the reward of the upward calling of God in Messiah Yeshua.

Philippians 3:12-14

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PIVOT

OUR OLD PUP, CHANSE.

The other day I was having so much fun playing fetch with our new pup, Dandy, in the backyard. He is only 11 weeks old but quick as a whip and loves to chase a ball and slide into it with a flourish, just like a kid would dramatically dive and slide to catch a football.

We try to expose him to new experiences and sounds, but the neighbor’s toy dog’s high-pitched, tiny yip stops him in mid-stream. Forget about finishing any job he set out to do when that happens; he high-tails it for the door with wide eyes as big as marbles.

How fast we can turn on a dime when one of our basic instincts kicks in. I’ve seen sweet mothers turn into a grimacing, staring, barely civil force to be reckoned with when their child hurts. I’ve also seen people make an about-face when they know a reward, good or bad, is coming. Sometimes the behavior sticks afterward, and sometimes it doesn’t. What motivates people to make permanent, pivotal changes in their life when a reward isn’t enough?

Sometimes discomfort does, and sometimes it doesn’t. Some of us keep going through the same pain, over and over, because we won’t change our ways even with warnings. Often those who overcome their fear of change clear the hurdles to more happiness and less discomfort.
The people who don’t make lasting changes are likely expecting others to change, so they don’t have to. It can be a long wait.

Overcomers not only seek answers but follow their findings.

Every pivot we make in our lives requires a decision. We decide to search for God. We decide we need Jesus. We decide to quit drinking alcohol, smoking, taking drugs, and celebrating things God convicts us to forgo not only for our good health but for the benefit of the people we love. We can decide our body is a temple, belonging to the Lord, on loan from Him while we reside on earth. We can choose to eat healthier. We choose to read and study the Bible to know our Creator better and follow Him.

Even though we sometimes flounder, wander, and stumble, it’s only a reminder of the ability of fear, ego, pride, and arrogance to pull us down.

We can choose to gather humility and pivot back toward True North, with Jesus Christ as our navigator. His love never changes.

This God—his way is perfect;
the word of the Lord proves true;
he is a shield for all those who take refuge in him. Psalm 18:30

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Clean

I recently got a little nostalgic and checked out the houses for sale in my small hometown in Iowa. I saw a home on the same street where my dad bought a house in his retirement years. It looked vaguely familiar, but I wasn’t sure if the address was the same. I couldn’t remember, and I was hoping it wasn’t.

Unfortunately, it turned out to be the same house he sold in 2003. It was unrecognizable and was in such horrible shape it looked like it could have been used as a crack house. The outside was in disrepair and needed painting. The inside was much worse. The carpets were torn up and filthy, and the walls were covered in what looked like mold or something splattered. I could see where a poster had hung, perfectly silhouetted by a layer of smoke residue. The blinds on the windows were broken and
bent.

With his own hands, Dad had gutted and remodeled the kitchen with new cupboards, countertops, wood laminate floor, fixtures, paint, etc., before he sold it. The only thing that still looked in reasonably decent shape was the floor. It made me sad to see what it looks like now.

We were raised to take care of our things to the best of our ability, even if they were used, old, and cheap. This included our clothes, toys, tools, appliances, and cars, as well as our homes. At the very least, when money is scarce or possessions are meager, keeping your home and yard clean and tidy give a sense of control. The calming effect is real, not only while you live there but also when you move or sell. A discipline of continued light upkeep saves time when it’s necessary to deep clean.

That said, I know some beautiful people who have relegated housecleaning to a lower rung on their list of priorities, and that’s their prerogative. Mary was an example when she sat listening at Jesus’s feet while her sister Martha scurried around trying to make things nice for Him. Mary’s reward was Martha’s lesson.

“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”
Luke 10:41-42

A common misunderstanding is that the saying “cleanliness is next to godliness” is in the Bible. Many parents have tried to pass that off to their kids as scriptural (my lips are sealed) when it’s not, in that sense.

2 Corninthians 7:1 says,
“Since we have these promises, beloved, let us cleanse ourselves from every defilement of body and spirit, bringing holiness to completion in fear of God.”

Of Jesus’s disciples, I can imagine Matthew, a tax collector, was calculated and meticulous, where Simon, a fisherman, was more laid back and, well, dirty and smelly. Both had their spiritual faults and physical and occupational differences, and both were essential in God’s plan for the world.

I find great comfort in knowing this:
Whether you decide to clean your house or come as you are,
Jesus welcomes you with open arms.

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ORDINARY

Are you content to be ordinary?

The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines the word “ordinary” as:

  1. common
  2. no exceptional ability
  3. not particularly good

In 2003, Robert S. McGee wrote a book and Bible Study called “The Search For Significance,” which detailed how to overcome our insecurities about our abilities and use our talents with freedom from the opinions of others and the pressures we place upon ourselves. The book was a huge success and became a classic, helping Christians to look past the lies they’ve been told about their worthiness and look to Christ for love, acceptance, and self-worth. 

As I look around at the world today, I see so much neediness as people grasp all sorts of things to fill the void in their lives; drugs, alcohol, food, sugar, social media, pornography, technology, work, exercise, and even church. When a person seeks relief from what ails them, “cures” abound. When one tool no longer fills the need, it’s easy to find a replacement.  

Temporal remedies, by nature, never last long. They only allow more time to avoid our need for Jesus in our lives. 

Yesterday I wrote about habits and how we cultivate them all the time. Without a doubt, developing a relationship with Jesus Christ is the best habit I’ve ever formed. Even with an imperfect life, He gives me joy. When I’m in pain, I have hope. When I feel insecure, I know I can run to Him for encouragement. When I’m afraid, He comforts. When I’m lonely, He reminds me He is always with me. When I feel beaten down by the world, He lifts me. 

Isn’t simple faith what most of us are looking for; knowing in our heart that we are loved and acceptable through Jesus who made us so? We don’t have to do anything to prove our worth because we are worthy by His grace. When I felt the gift of grace was when everything else paled in comparison.

I’ve never heard anyone say they were sorry they knew Jesus, but I’ve listened to many regrets that it took so long to want to.

You are more than ordinary.

If you are His, you are chosen, and your significance is His Glory. 

Believe and respond.

For many are called, but few are chosen. Matthew 22:14

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CHANGES

I was sitting here after consulting the Lord, wondering what I should write about today. Daily writing is part of a new discipline I’m trying to develop. Even if it’s only for fifteen minutes, it’s a start.  

We learn new habits all the time. Whenever God blesses us with an opportunity, lesson, or sweet reward, He helps us make the needed adjustments to glorify His name.  

Parents who have their first baby find themselves doing things that used to repulse them, like changing dirty diapers and getting up much earlier than they ever imagined. They seek information to give the best care to their little one, and the lion they never knew they had inside reveals in a protective posture against anyone who might do their child harm.

A new job can bring many changes; different hours, new location, learning skills, and more personality challenges to navigate while enjoying income security.

Lessons are not a bad thing, but some lessons are so complicated, if we aren’t careful, they can cause us to stagnate and look down instead of reaching up for the helping hand. 

Lessons that involve other people and how we react to what they have done or not done can be devastating. A single proactive prayer when facing the temptation to respond without the Lord in mind is grounding.  

One of the most challenging things I ever did was start praying for someone who hurt me deeply. I didn’t pray for them to get what I thought they deserved; I prayed for them to be healthy, happy, and prosperous. So hard to do. I didn’t mean it as the words left my mouth but almost without notice, the day came when the prayer was effortless, and I knew I had come through it, and everything was going to be okay. 

Cursing the darkness doesn’t make it go away, but praying and embracing the light will. Make the changes in yourself, and the rest will follow. God will sustain you in the thickness and bring you through to the other side. 

You are loved. 

You are worthy.  

You can do this.  

Let Jesus help you.

“For since He Himself was tempted in that which He has suffered, He is able to come to the aid of those who are tempted.” Hebrews 2:18

WALLET

God amazes with His provision.

When my oldest was 17, he lost his wallet on one of our day trips down to Great Sand Dunes National Park in Colorado and didn’t realize it until we were in the car on the way home to Denver, a good 3+ hour drive.

To give some context, Great Sand Dunes Park looks like the Sahara. People look like pinpoints on the huge dunes. At the bottom runs a creek where families wade and play in the sand.

It was windy and hot, and we spent most of the day hiking the dunes and the boys rolled down them. We suspect that was how Justin lost his wallet from his back pocket and with the blowing sand, it surely got covered. Justin had just been paid and cashed his check for his part-time job so over $200 was lost. We had little hope of getting the wallet back.


As soon as we walked in the door at home, there was a message on the answering machine. A woman had found his wallet, and get this…she lived in Denver just a couple miles from us! She would accept no reward but we all marveled at our “good fortune”.

I hope Justin remembers that kindness, and the amazing gift that God provided by placing that good woman in the right place at the right time.

“Grace and peace be multiplied to you through the knowledge of God, and of Jesus our Lord.” 2 Peter 1:2